Feel Like Giving Up on Fat Loss? 3 Questions to Ask

Nikkiey: Most of us, when we feel the urge to give up and we feel the urge to quit, we don't actually want to give up. We just want the weight of everything we're carrying to be a little bit lighter. You want a break from constantly thinking about food. You want a break from constantly weighing your food and tracking your food. You want a break from that, let's be real. But here's the thing: quitting might take the pressure off for a minute, but it won't bring you peace. You don't need to throw the whole thing away. You just need to remember what you're really after.

What's up, everyone? Hey, you guys. Welcome back to another episode of The WarriorBabe Show with Nikkiey Stott, co-founder of WarriorBabe. On this podcast, we talk about mindset, methodologies, and tactics that will help you lose body fat, build muscle, be strong, and feel insanely confident. I'm your host, Nikkiey Stott, and welcome to episode number 302.

Today I want to dive in to some tough love, but a heart-to-heart moment. Things that I would have conversations about with my clients, even conversations with my team. I want this one to be for the woman who feels like she is on the edge. The one who's feeling like, I'm doing all the things, but also thinking, why am I stuck? Maybe you're tracking your macros. Maybe you're lifting. Maybe you've tried reverse dieting. You're following every suggestion. You're doing the plan. You've tried multiple plans. And yet you still feel heavy.

Not just physically, but more emotionally. You feel stuck. You feel frustrated. You feel exhausted. You're wondering if it's even worth it. You've probably thought, what's the point if I'm doing everything and nothing's changing? I'm tired of working this hard and not seeing the results. Maybe I'm just not cut out for this. This one's for you, babe. Because if that's where you're at right now, first off, I want you to know you're not lazy and you're not failing. You are in the exact moment where literally everything can change if you don't run away from it.

So this is what this episode is going to be about. It's not to talk you into quitting, obviously. It's not to make you feel some type of shame for where you're at right now. It's to wake you up. It's to give you that little nudge. It's to encourage you. It's to motivate you. It's to be like, yo, let's bring back your fire. It's a challenge to this story that's going on in your mind that says, I can't, or every other little excuse that you're using, where you may feel like you're in a valley right now and you want to try and get back up onto the mountaintop.

So you're going to hear three tough, truth-telling questions from me in this episode. Like I said, questions I asked myself, questions I asked clients when I worked with them one-on-one, questions I asked my team, questions I asked people around me when they were telling me, in a fitness context, Nikkiey, I'm ready to give up. Nothing's working. This is so frustrating. And all of the feelings: I quit.

There have been conversations I've been in with people like that, and these are the questions. There are going to be three of them, and the last one is going to be the most important one that we go through today. Because this is the thing: 99% of the time, it's not about giving up. It's not about quitting. It's about what maybe you haven't confronted yet. So that's what we're going to do in this episode. We're going to dig deep. We're going to flip the script. We're going to get into it.

And one thing this is: it isn't motivation. It's about maturity in your mindset. Because this isn't a diet that you can hop on and hop off. We're done with this hamster wheel. If you know the gist of these episodes and the tone and everything that I believe in, we're done with these hamster wheels, man. I don't want you being on these hamster wheels. So it's really about that maturity in your mindset. This is your life. This is your body.

Every single woman that I've coached who's transformed her body in her forties and her fifties and her sixties has hit a breaking point like this. There have been many women who have said, Nikkiey, I just want to give up. What's the point anymore? And I'm telling you, this is the verge of your breakthrough. This is where you feel like you're at right now. And the only reason why these women didn't break and didn't give up is because they learned to ask themselves better questions when things got hard, instead of, ah, I'm just going to give up. If you do that, it's just going to happen again in a different form or a different fashion. You're here for the long game. That's what this is all about. You're here to stop starting over.

So let me be real. The first question that I have for you is: am I actually doing the work, or am I just staying busy? Because if I'm being real, busy feels productive, right? You open the app, you post in the community, you sort of log your food, you kind of do the workouts. But are you truly in integrity with what you said you were committing to? Just let that sink in a bit.

Let me ask you this too. Are you eating your macros, or are you just, quote unquote, eating clean and guessing, and then saying, oh, but I eat healthy? Are you lifting with intention, or are you just going through the motions? Are you going to the workout and doing the workout, but not actually intentionally there? Are you prioritizing sleep, your stress management, your check-ins?

How seriously are you taking your check-ins on a weekly basis? If you're a WarriorBabe, are you giving one-word answers on our check-in forms? Or are you a bi-weekly checker, even though your coach wants you to check in weekly? How serious is that? Or are you skipping them when life gets too busy? Busy doesn't change your body. Busy keeps you stuck in the loop of almost. You're almost consistent. You're almost there. You're almost enough. You're almost getting stronger. It keeps you in this loop of almost.

I want to speak from experience, because I used to be the queen of busy. I filled my calendar with tasks but avoided the real work. Let me be real with you. How many of you have every single hour blocked off on your calendar, but some tasks don't really take that long? The tracking, the honest reflection, the accountability: that really brought it to light for me, because that's where the truth comes from. If you pay attention to what you're eating, you're going to get the honest reflection of how much you are or are not eating of what you need. And then that should be the accountability to say, okay, I need to get things into gear.

Why? Because real work feels vulnerable. Real work makes you look in the mirror and say, I'm not where I want to be yet, but I'm done lying to myself. Because again, if I bring it back to the nutrition aspect, some of you say, I eat healthy, but you're really just eating clean and guessing. Some people are eating cereal for breakfast, then maybe two lean patties for lunch, and then a chicken breast and something for dinner. If you are somebody who does that breakfast, lunch and dinner type of deal, I challenge you to put that into MyFitnessPal and pay attention to how much food that actually is. It's not a lot of food.

But then people say, well, Nikkiey, I want to get abs and I want to get muscle. And I say, okay, let me look at what you're eating. And then they say that type of stuff. And I say, well, why don't you go track it and really see what it is? Because if you want muscle, that amount of food ain't going to build it. It's probably maybe 30, 40, 50 grams of protein.

But what I'm saying is, when you can be vulnerable and have that reflection on yourself, and you can be honest and you have awareness, then it's like, okay, I can look at it at face value. I can look at it objectively, and I can set myself free. Because this question stings, right? Am I actually doing the work, or am I just staying busy? Are you tracking all of your meals for the week and putting them in MyFitnessPal, but then you only make it two days in, and you leave MyFitnessPal set up that way for the entire week? That's not doing the work. That's lying to yourself.

And these things should feel uncomfortable. If you're like, dang, you're speaking right at me, I want to have that wake-up call with you, because it should set you free. Once you get honest, you take your power back. So right now, ask yourself: where am I hiding behind busyness instead of being fully in it? Even with your workouts, like, oh, I'm just in and out. Yeah, but is that really doing the work, or do you know you need to be a little bit more intentional with it? Where do you need to recommit?

You don't need to be perfect. Let me remind you of that. It's not an all-or-nothing mentality. You don't have to be perfect. You just need to be real with yourself about where you may be lacking in certain buckets of your fitness lifestyle. So that's question number one.

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All right, let's get back to the show. Question number two is: do I really want to quit, or do I just want some type of relief? This one's deep, because most of us, when we feel the urge to give up and we feel the urge to quit, we don't actually want to give up. We just want the weight of everything we're carrying to be a little bit lighter. You want a break from constantly thinking about food. You want a break from constantly weighing your food and tracking your food and putting it in MyFitnessPal. You want a break from that. Let's be real.

You want a break from feeling guilty when you mess up. If you plan all your meals for the week and then on Wednesday you mess up, you feel guilty, and you want a break from feeling guilty. You want a break from feeling like every day is a test and you're failing. Maybe I'm even stirring some things up emotionally with you right now. You didn't make it to the gym all of the times you said you were committed to this week, and now you feel like you're failing, and it's like a test every single day. I'm going to make it to the gym. I'm not going to make it to the gym. You want a break from that.

I get it. You are juggling a lot. You have work. You have responsibilities. You have family. You have expectations. You have soccer practice with your kids. You have emotions. You're juggling a lot. And somewhere in the middle of that, you're also trying to rebuild your metabolism. You're trying to rebuild your habits. You're trying to make yourself stronger and have a healthier body. That's a lot, right?

But here's the thing. Quitting might take the pressure off for a minute, but it won't bring you peace. Peace comes from being in alignment. Peace comes from knowing that you're honoring your body, your future, your potential. Peace comes from showing up, especially when it gets hard. So if you're craving some type of relief, maybe you don't need to quit. Maybe you just need a reset.

Maybe, if you're a WarriorBabe, you just need to have a heart-to-heart with your coach and offload. I joke all the time that us coaches are also your personal therapists. Obviously I'm joking when I say that, because that would blend our scope of practice. But if you need to have a heart-to-heart, at least at WarriorBabe, I can say that our coaches are there for you and will hold space for you. Or maybe you just need a moment to unplug. Maybe you need a spa day. Maybe you need to breathe. And then come back clearer, stronger, more grounded.

You don't need to throw the whole thing away. You just need to remember what you're really after, the goals that you're really after. That's a lifetime commitment, the goals that you have, if you want to pursue them the right way. The long game. You're here to play the long game. You're not doing this hamster wheel of things, because if you were doing the hamster wheel of things, you would have already quit, start, quit, start, quit, start, quit, start. Because you do want relief from the diet, and you want relief from the eating, and you want relief from the working out.

But maybe it's like, dude, I need to intentionally tell myself that I need a reset. You give yourself maybe a week to reset. It's not you quitting. It's you getting clearer, grounded, and being reminded of what you're really after. You're really after the freedom aspect, which you can gain if you keep trudging and plugging along, because things will get easier and easier and easier the more that it morphs into your identity and your reality of being a healthy individual who works out and prioritizes your nutrition. So you're really after that, not relief.

That's the second question that I have for you: do you really want to quit, or do you just want some type of relief? If I was your coach, I'd say, let's talk about it. Where do you feel like you're carrying the weight of everything and you want it to be lighter? Let's have a heart-to-heart about what you're feeling and strategize a game plan so that you can have a reset or a spa day.

Because even though you know you need a spa day, let me tell you, are you actually going to book that spa day? Probably not. It is so hard to do things for ourselves that we know we need. That's why I love having a coach too. The coach will tell you to do this. The coach may even book it for you.

Okay, so that was the second question. The third question I have for you is probably the most important one. These are all very important, but this one is: what would the strongest version of me do next?

Just close your eyes. Breathe with me for a second. If you're driving, don't close your eyes, clearly. But take a deep breath. Picture the version of you who is walking in full confidence. Not because she hit a goal weight, but because she knows who she is. She honors her body. She doesn't self-sabotage. She walks into a room and she doesn't shrink. She walks in with light. She walks in with strength, confidence, that silent strength. That version of you exists.

She's inside of you, waiting to be unleashed. She's not a fantasy. She's a future you. She's a future that you either step into or you delay. And the way that you step into her isn't complicated. It's really through your choices.

I did an episode on this. It's probably one of the first five. It's really good, and if you haven't listened to it, I would highly recommend you listen to it: Who Are You Becoming? If you've been an avid listener for all 302 episodes, maybe go back and revisit that one.

Because where you are right now obviously has to change in some facet, in some way. It means breaking old patterns, thoughts, stories and old habits, and forming new habits that are basically what that future you already has. So there's a big gap in between where you are now and where you want to be. There's a gap of you stepping into her.

Ask yourself about your future you, the person who has already accomplished the goals that you want to accomplish, who is aesthetically healthy, with the body that you're dreaming of, because she's done all the things. She tracked her macros. You can't get to your end goal without knowing exactly what your nutrition looks like on a daily basis. So your end-goal person already has that skill set. Your end-goal person has committed herself to working out. Your end-goal person has committed herself to meal prepping. She's done those things, because she's clearly gotten that result by doing those things.

So, in your current self right now: would your future self skip this workout? Would she quit because the scale hasn't moved? Let me tell you, the mindset of your future you has a totally different relationship with the scale than the current version of you has with it. Would she quit because the scale hasn't moved? No. Would she ghost her coach, or would she show up honestly? Would she stay stuck in guilt, like, oh man, I messed up, I failed today? Or would she get back in the game?

You don't become her and then act like her. You need to act like her now, and then you become her. That is how you close that gap. And trust me, there are all the messy emotions and thoughts and stories and things that will hold you back from acting like her every day. But if you can make one incremental change consistently of acting like her, then you will become her quicker.

If you remember my story, if you listen back to episode one, I did everything really fast, from the beginning of 2025 to the end of 2025, when I completely transformed my body and then competed in a bodybuilding competition and won and went pro, and then went on to do that three more times and left undefeated. I said no to a lot of situations and things. I tracked my meals. I worked out. I didn't miss a beat, because I was acting like the future me. And I became her pretty quickly.

And you can do the same thing. But I'll tell you first and foremost, it's hard. But the decisions you make in the hard moments define the woman that you become in the strong ones. So I would always say: choose her, choose strength, choose your future.

And I'll even say this, on the faith side, if you're on your walk: we all have an audience of one. He would want us to choose him, and also to choose us, in the moments where we only need to please one person. And our body is our temple, right? So showing up in these facets and becoming the strongest version of you is all he would want for us, and it is totally possible for you to accomplish as well.

With that last question, what would the strongest version of me do next? Maybe tomorrow morning you wake up and it's 5 a.m., and yeah, you don't want to go to the gym. But what would the strongest version of me do next? Would she skip this workout? No. So start asking yourself these questions, and maybe you should show up a little bit differently.

I know today's episode was more tough love and being truthful. Sometimes the truth is the most loving thing that someone can hand you. You guys know that I love you so much. Sometimes the truth can be very uncomfortable, but I want you all to win. And sometimes you have to ask yourself these uncomfortable questions to really see where your blind spots are. If you can bring that blind spot to awareness, you'll be able to show up differently, with more honesty with yourself.

So if you feel like you're behind, you feel like you're failing, and you feel like you want to give up: you're not done. You're just in a valley. But valleys are where you build resilience. Valleys are where you recommit. Valleys are where you decide what's the best thing that you need right now, and you get honest with yourself.

So before you quit, get honest about whether you're doing the real work. Ask yourself that question: am I doing the real work? Ask yourself if you want to quit, or if you just want to feel better. And then tap into the version of you who's already made it, who's already accomplished this. She already exists. Tap into her and ask her what she would do right now.

You've got way more in the tank, babe. Way more in the tank. You've got more fight in your spirit. This isn't the end. This is your invitation. This is your invitation to recommit, to open up, to be honest with yourself, and then to take action. That's it. Take action. I believe in you guys. Now I want you to go believe in yourselves. I love you all, and I'll see you in the next episode. Peace out.

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