Forget Goals, Focus On This

00:00Real quick, the only ask I could ever have of you guys is to help spread the word so we can help more women lose body fat, build muscle, reach their goals, and feel insanely confident. And the only way we can do that is if you rate, review, and share this podcast. So the single thing I ask for you to do is if you could leave a review. It will take you 10 seconds, and it will mean the absolute world to me and may change the world of someone else. So many people think that you have to change the result, but the results aren't the problem.

00:30What really needs to change are the systems that cause those results. So for example, you want to change your body. Your body isn't the problem. What got you to that body are the systems that cause the body you have, and those systems are what need to change. Yo, yo, yo. What is going on, my friends? Welcome back to The WarriorBabe Show with Nikki Stott, co-founder of Warrior Babe. And on this podcast, we talk about mindset, methodologies, and tactics that will help you lose body fat, build muscle, be strong, and feel insanely confident.

01:07I am your host, Nikki Stott. And welcome to today's episode, episode 133, where we're going to dive into one of my favorite topics that I talk about. I've talked about it before on the podcast. I talked about, I think it was like episode number two, and I'm like, yo, I got to bring this back. And I talk about this in our VIP community. I host our community call with our Warrior Babe VIPs. We've got like 1,800 women inside that program right now. And a couple weeks ago, this is a topic that I brought to them.

01:41And I was like, you know what? I need to bring it back to the podcast because it's actually the perfect time of year to bring it back. You know, we're moving into the third month of the new year. And so I think it's a really good time to think about the way that you are thinking about your goals. So what I'm going to talk about today is I want you guys to actually forget about your goals and focus on your systems instead. Because mainly where you are at right now, let's say, let's speak to the ones that may not be where they want it to be three months into the new year.

02:19But and or like two, but like coming into the third one and you're just so focused, like you're hyper focused on the goal, right? Like the weight, like you losing the weight and you're so focused on, you know, the progress pictures and you're so focused on getting that result, right? You're like, oh, my God, summer's a couple months away. Like, I need this result right now. Like, you are so attached to this result. And so what I would say is to those of you guys that aren't where you want to be right now is that you need to think about your approach differently.

02:56And you need to focus on are the systems that you are implementing on a regular basis, on a day to day basis, are those systems, systems that are in alignment with getting you getting to that goal? OK, so like think about like this. Goals are about the result that you want to achieve. The systems are about the processes that lead you to those results. So your goal might be, like I just mentioned a little bit ago, like to lose body fat, to build muscle, to see the number go down the scale.

03:26Your system is eating right. Your system is tracking the macros. If you're there and doing that right now, your your system is consistently on a weekly basis, doing those things like tracking macros, doing those things like eating right, doing those things like drinking your water, doing the things like getting your your workout in, getting enough sleep, you know, doing getting your workouts done in a way that also is working with your schedule. So like maybe the first month of the new year, you're like going like six days a week and you're like, this is not realistic to my schedule right now.

04:02And you've got to like pull it back and be realistic with yourself and be like, OK, I'm going to get into the gym four days a week. And that works for my schedule. Right. Those are your systems. Figuring that stuff out is your system. So why you aren't where you thought you would be right now is because you're inconsistent in one of those things. You're inconsistent with your systems, but you're so hyper focused on that goal. That goal is not going to happen until you get consistent with the systems, until you build and develop and focus on the systems instead and like detach yourself away from that goal.

04:36You're going to get to that goal. These systems are in place. OK, so so many problems, frustrations, like so many of that of what I'm saying, if you're not there where you thought you would be coming into March, they so many problems and so many false like these bad narratives in your brains. All you guys, you spend so much time thinking about those goals and not enough time designing and getting better at the systems. Right. You're so hyper focused on I need to lose 10 pounds.

05:08But then like you're if you're not there by March, you're like, why am I not there? And then you're blaming something outside of yourself, the program, the weather. I don't know. But what really needs to be blamed is yourself. You need to take ownership of it. You're not being consistent in some realm of your day to day, you know, systems. Point blank. OK, so what I want to talk about, there's four specific things that I want to kind of talk about in this episode today.

05:42I almost feel like I just want to continue on that ramp, but I'm going to bring it back and I'm going to probably rant inside of these four things I want to share with you. There's four reasons why you need to forget about the goals. OK, so I hope leaving this podcast like it's a if you've listened to this before, this is just music to your ears right now. Or it's like, oh, damn, I need it to hear this again. Like you've heard me talk about this before and you're like this right now is resonating with me the most. Light bulbs are going off and I am going to do something after this podcast. Right. After you get off this podcast.

06:12That is literally all that I hope and ask for that. You just get off the podcast. You learn something new and you go and implement it. You go and take action on it because the goals that you want to accomplish are not going to you're not going to get them with inaction. You're not going to get them by listening to 133 episodes of my podcast and doing nothing about it. OK, so with love, please take something away from this podcast today and go implement it. All right. OK, number one, one of the reasons why you should forget about your goals and focus on your systems instead is think about it like this.

06:46Winners and losers have the same exact goals. And guys, first of all, one, you probably hear Maverick in the background right now. I'm being a real human. He is playing with a toy to this. What I'm taking this from is the book Atomic Habits. And I'm just bringing this full circle. If you have not read the book, I would highly recommend that you do. These are some of my favorite things in the first few chapters that he dives into. So number one, winners and losers have the same goals. Successful and unsuccessful people share the same goals.

07:18You and I have the same goals. People who sign up for programs have the same goals. But why do some win and why do some lose? Why do some get amazing results and others don't? If you're signing up for a program, you literally have access to the same thing that the winner has access to. But hey, you're, you know, why do the losers lose? Right. Why do some get amazing results and others don't? You are a part of the same thing. Like what I use as an example when it was on our VIP call. It's like there's are we have 40 coaches on our team and then each of those coaches have individual roster sizes.

07:55And on one of the coaches individual roster size, there are some amazing winners. And then there are some losers that are inactive. They get into the program. They don't do anything with it. And then they get mad at us because the program didn't work. You didn't work the program. OK, I just want to nail that into the brains. Like you actually got to do some work. And like I said, there's some winners on these rosters that are winning. Why are they winning? Right. And so goals can't be what differentiates winners from losers.

08:26You guys all have the same goals. You and I have the same goal. So goals can't be what differentiates that. It's the systems that you implement that make all of the freaking difference. Why there's winners that are on these coaches rosters is because they are doing that. They are implementing and they are building upon their systems. They are getting better at their systems. They are listening to their coach. They are checking in with their coach. They're doing what their coach is telling them to do. They're tracking their macros. They're learning their macros. They're learning that they need more protein. They're getting in the workout said four days a week, three days a week, five days a week.

08:59They're doing the work. They're implementing their systems. They're shutting down at night and not looking at their phones before they go to bed so they can get good quality sleep because sleep is important recovery factor. Right. They are doing the things in a consistent manner. And if they fail, they're looking at it as an opportunity to be like, okay, what can I change up to do better next time? I'm going to slow my talking down because I'm talking very fast right now. But this stuff gets me hyped up because literally the losers, you guys, and I say this with love, but also I want to be able to like get to you guys.

09:29You guys can have all the things that the winners are having. You just have to, you have to commit. You have to commit to the journey that you signed up for, the money that you invested into a program. You have to commit for yourself to do this type of work. Right. And you have to recognize that. Okay. I have this goal, but like, I'm not going to get to that goal unless I implement these things that Nikki's talking about right now, the systems, unless I implement them that that

10:04will make all of the difference. Right. Hey, Hey, just want to drop a huge appreciation to you guys listening to the show. It means a lot. I hope you guys are enjoying it and there's so much more to come with it. If you are enjoying it, hit the subscribe button. I'd appreciate that tons. And also it would help this podcast reach others who need to hear these messages too. The winners are because they do the program consistently where the others are inconsistent. This, this, here's an example. Winners go Monday to Sunday.

10:34Losers go Monday to Friday and take the weekends off. And I say this with love. Like if this is you guys and you're wondering why results are taking longer and not seeing the results that you want. I mean, we were going into the third month of the new year and you're like, why am I not where I want to be? And you're somebody that takes the weekends off and you're only a Monday through Friday person and everything you sell sabotage, you drink alcohol, you go out with friends, you overeat, you, you know, X, Y, and Z. You're going out to restaurants Saturday and Sunday and you're not paying attention. You're not working out and you're not paying attention to your nutrition.

11:05You're not making choices. You're not saying no to things. That is why you are where you are right now. And that's why the same person assigned for the same program on January 1st or made the commitment to themselves and is so much further along is because they are going Monday through Sunday and they are getting uncomfortable by saying no to certain things. They're removing certain things from their life. They're choosing food options that serve their goals. That's a winner's mentality. Winners take action. Then they optimize their systems to support themselves, their lifestyle, and the advancement

11:37of their goals. So, and then losers. And I, again, like guys, I say this with so much freaking love. Like I am a tough love person. This is why I've worked with hundreds and hundreds of women when I was in my coaching era. And I created some amazing transformations. And now I get to coach our coaches to do the same things. But I did it because I said things that were uncomfortable, but were also very true and got right to the point. And it was the things that these clients needed to hear.

12:08Okay. They don't need the fluff. They don't need like the, some of them do. Some of them need like a sandwich approach. It's a positive. And it's like the, but we need to work on this. And then there's a sandwich on a positive closeout. But some of them just need to like, yo, Nikki, say it to me straight. And I'm like, cool. I'm going to say it to you straight. You need to do better. You need to be more consistent. You need to follow through. You need to go Monday to Sunday. And you need to have some uncomfortable conversation where you're saying no to some alcohol. And you need to take responsibility of it. Right? So losers, when I say that, I'm saying it like, like the inaction.

12:42Like those are the ones that are in, they're not doing what they're taking. They're not, it's an inaction. And the excuses as to why they can't support, you know, achieving their goals. Like the, I don't have enough time or I'm too busy. Like literally guys, the next time you say those words out of your mouth, I don't have enough time. I'm too busy. Just tell yourself that you're not making it a priority. Because that's exactly what you're doing. And what the winners do is that they do make it a priority. Okay?

13:12So that's number one. Winners and losers have the same goals. You guys have literally the same goals. So goals can't be what differentiates it. What differentiates it is why winners win is because they implement systems that get them to their goals. And they take action on those systems. And they optimize their systems. Whereas losers get submerged by inaction. They get submerged by excuses. They get submerged by a narrative in their brain of I don't have enough time or I'm too busy. Trust me on that one. Ain't nobody too busy than a mom that I used to coach who has four kids, two sets of twins.

13:49You can watch this YouTube video of her journey on our Warrior Baby YouTube channel. Two sets of twins at the age of four. Oh, and also later on in her journey, she got diagnosed with cancer. That's not in that YouTube video. But she's and now she's back in Warrior Baby. And she's still making it happen. So please don't tell me you don't have enough time. And also please don't tell me that you're too busy. Okay? Because I will just fire right back at that with that story. If you want it that bad, you will make it happen. And you have to commit to yourself to make it happen.

14:19Okay? The next thing is, is number two, is the reason why you need to stop thinking about goals. Okay? And focus on these systems is because achieving a goal is only a monetary. It's only a moment. It's only a momentary change. So, like, think about it like this. You're not happy with your body, right? You're not happy. I'm going to use the New Year's or even going into, like, the third month of the New Year. You're not happy with what your body is. And then you, all of a sudden, you find a new plan. And you get all of this amazing energy to make a change.

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15:29Imagine knowing exactly what your body needs to see real results and results that last. Look, don't wait anymore. Take charge of your health and join our community of strong, empowered women. Visit WarriorBabe.com forward slash apply today to start your transformation. That's WarriorBabe.com forward slash apply. All right. Let's get back to the show. But if you maintain the same habits of inconsistency, okay, you get all this momentum at the beginning, right?

16:02But then all of a sudden, and maybe this is you right now, right? You have all of this exciting effort at the beginning of the new year to do all the things, to change all the things. And like you do change all the things and you make a change for the time being, right? But then, bam, like February 1 comes or the second, like there's sort of stats. Like New Year's has like a ton of New Year's resolutions inside the gym and gyms are packed. And then come March and April, it's just like back to normal. Which is what happens here is if these you people are maintaining the same habits of inconsistency,

16:35they're eating bad, they're not eating enough, they're fearing carbs, they're not getting to the workout as they promised themselves the new year, they're not following through on their workout schedule, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. The same habits that got you in the unhappy situation to begin with will soon again, because you're focused on the goal, you're only focused on the goal. And if you're only focused on the goal, you're not focused on the consistent action of things, of eating better, loving carbs, getting your workout in, right? The habits of inconsistency creep back in and what got you into the unhappy situation

17:10will soon make you unhappy again. If all that you're focused on is this losing weight or stepping on the scale and seeing the number go down or, you know, what I like to say, honestly, it's like a superficial goal. You know, can you get deeper with yourself? Can you tell yourself that you have a reason why that you're doing this, right? Do you have a reason that you want to show up on a regular, like I get a side note. Whenever I ask clients I worked with, you know, why do you want to do this? Or like, I want to lose weight and I want to look good in a bikini.

17:42I'm like, cool, that's very superficial. Can we get a little bit deeper than that? Like, can you tell me why you want to do this? And they're like, well, you know, I grew up with my mom who was like, you know, just diet after diet after diet and then gained weight every single time. And I don't want to do that for my kids. I'm like, cool, we're getting deeper here. Or, you know, even intimacy is lacking. And I want intimacy to be better with my partner. Amazing. Let's keep going. I want to be a role model. All these things. That's deeper. Anyway, I kind of got sidetracked there.

18:13But sooner or later, like if you're only focused on a goal and you're unhappy with your body, you start a new program, but you continue on with like you're not fully committed to it and you fall back into the inconsistencies again, you're soon going to get to the point where you're unhappy again. And so you're left chasing the same outcome because you never changed the system behind it. Did you hear me in there say that if you maintain the same habits of inconsistency, you're soon going to be left where you were. You were chasing the outcome. You're attached to the goal, but you never focused on changing the systems instead.

18:47You never built the habits that would support your goals. Instead, you stayed the same and expected a different outcome. So many people think that you have to change the result, but the results aren't the problem. Really easy change are the systems that cause those results. So for example, you want to change your body. Your body isn't the problem. What got you to that body, what or how you were eating or if you do or don't exercise or, you know, your sleep schedule or the lack of drinking enough water, the list goes on.

19:21What got you to that body are the systems that cause the body you have. And those systems are what need to change. Does that make sense? So everyone thinks that the results have to change. Like you're like, like your example, you want to change your body, but your body is not the problem. The systems that cause you to get that body are the problem. Not eating, not, not eating right. How you're eating, not exercising, not getting enough sleep, which is highly stressed, X, Y, and Z. Those are what need to change.

19:52Eating right, working out, getting enough sleep, right? Those are the systems. When you solve problems at a results level, you only solve them temporarily. It's why people yo-yo. And this is what I was going to say a second ago. This is why people yo-yo through different plans and programs. Six weeks to change the result. But yet after six weeks are up, the weight comes right back on. In order to improve for the good, in order to improve for the long game,

20:23that I say this is the game that you are playing, right? This is your health. You want it to be good for the long term. In order to improve that for good, you need to solve problems at the systems level. Number three. This one hit home for a couple of warrior babes when I was on this call sharing this information with them a couple weeks ago. Goals restrict your happiness. So everyone thinks, like I even fell victim to this in the beginning of my journey. Everyone thinks that once I reach this goal, I will be happy.

20:55Once I have my dream body, I can be happy. Once I lose 20 pounds, I can be happy. Once I lose 50 pounds, I can be happy. Once I look better in my bikini, I can be happy. With that goal, mentally, you are continuously pushing and putting your own happiness off until you reach that goal. So goals create this like either or conflict. Like you achieve it and you're successful or you fail and you're disappointed.

21:28And it's unlikely, you guys, like I want to say this loud and clear. It's unlikely that when you, that your actual path through your journey will match exactly the progress that you had in mind when you set out. Okay, so like what I mean by that is like everyone thinks or everyone signs up for program. They're like, in three months, I'm going to lose 20 pounds. And they're like, I can be happy when I get to that point. And then you don't get to that point. Because as I'm saying here, your actual path through your journey

22:01may not match exactly the progress you had in mind out of the gate. That happens a lot more often than not. And so there at that point, you've now considered yourself a failure and you're disappointed. It creates this either or effect. Develop the systems first mentality. When you fall in love with the process, when you fall in love at the point of signing up for a program and recognizing that you've now, you're falling in love with yourself because you made a decision to do something for yourself. You fall in love with the process at that point.

22:32And if you can keep your mind focused on that type of narrative rather than the product, you don't have to wait to give yourself permission to be happy. Okay? Beautiful. So right now, if there's any one of these numbers that you're going to focus on getting off the podcast, right now, be happy. Wherever you are in your journey, you've made a decision to be here at this moment. Be grateful for where you are. If there's things that need to change, take ownership for them and change them.

23:04Okay? And develop a systems first mentality. Fall in love with the process rather than the product. And then the last one. And we kind of touched on this a little bit in number two, but the goal oriented mind creates the yo-yo effect. So think about, this is a good example. Think about runners who work hard for months on end. Like, ones that are training for, like, marathons or half marathons or triathlons or 50k ultras or 100k this.

23:37Like, they train for months on end. But as soon as they cross the finish line, they stop training. Maybe not for the ones that are, like, the avid runners. But, like, see, like, just like a half marathon. A lot of people love to do half marathons. Like, kick it into gear. Like, I'm going to sign up for this because I need to do this. And as soon as they cross the finish line, they stop training, right? Or, you know, like I said earlier, it's, like, six weeks to this and then the results stop for, like, online programs. The goal is no longer there to motivate them.

24:09So they have this goal of running a half marathon. They train for it. And they're so attached to this goal because they're oriented on it that when it's done, they stop training. Because the goal is no longer there anymore. This is why people revert back to all of their old habits after accomplishing a goal. This is why people gain back all of their weight after they finish six weeks to this type of result. Or an eight-week challenge to this is because they didn't get the systems down pat.

24:41They were so oriented on the goal and the finish line that there is no freaking finish line, my friends. If you are working to optimize your health and to build more muscle and to be the best you for longevity, you're going to do that to your dying day. So you might as well right now take in the systems to help you get to that and to develop it and to get used to it and to build upon it and to change your lifestyle. You know, it's a lot to unpack there. But if that's something you want to do and you really want to be healthy, that's what you have to do.

25:13Okay? The purpose of setting goals, guys, the purpose of setting goals is to win the game. It's to cross the finish line. The purpose of building systems is to continue playing the game. It's to continue playing the game of life. It's to continue to play the game of being healthy. There is no finish line. True long-term thinking is goalless thinking. It's not about any single accomplishment. It's about the cycle of endless refinement and continuous improvement along your journey.

25:46If you want better results, forget about setting goals. And like this doesn't sound sexy because everything in the fitness industry is like six weeks of this, eight weeks of this, 21 weeks of this, you know. You know what happens with Warrior Babe? Warrior Babe sign up for a year. A year. One year. 12 months. I am setting realistic expectations out of the gate with our clients having that option to sign up for a year. Because that well may be what it takes to get somewhere with building habits, building systems, and then along the way seeing the results happen.

26:26Okay? Forget about setting goals. Focus on your systems instead. And I promise you the whole journey is going to be so much more fun, so much more rewarding. And you have something when you're building systems and then you're looking at the results that you're getting from it. You can be so damn proud of yourself for implementing and getting better at the systems on a day-to-day basis because it all will compound over months and years and decades.

26:57All right, my friends. So, again, like the last one I just talked about, goal-oriented mindsets create a yo-yo effect. Goals restrict your happiness. Achieving goal is only a momentary change. And then winners and losers have the same goals. Successful and unsuccessful people have the same goals. They have shared goals. So, in all of those things, the systems is what matters. The systems are the processes that will get you to those goals. The goals are just the results. That's it. How are you going to get the results? You're going to get them by implementing and nailing down your systems.

27:30So, my friends, with that being said, I hope you enjoyed this podcast. I hope that please get off this podcast and whatever words resonate with you the most on this, go and implement it. And then also, please, I would highly appreciate if you guys left a review. I love reading the feedback that you guys have about this podcast, how it's changing your world, how it's changing your lives, how the insights and knowledge are next level.

28:01And you are implementing the things I'm sharing. I love reading that. So, please, you could just take like 30 seconds following this podcast and just go leave a review. I would highly appreciate it. Thanks so much. See you next time. Real quick. Real quick. The only ask I could ever have of you guys is to help spread the word so we can help more women lose body fat, build muscle, reach their goals and feel insanely confident. And the only way we can do that is if you rate, review and share this podcast. So, the single thing I ask for you to do is if you could leave a review.

28:32It will take you 10 seconds and it will mean the absolute world to me and may change the world of someone else.

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