Goals vs Systems: Why You're Not Reaching Fitness Goals

Nikkiey: Real quick, the only ask I could ever have of you guys is to help spread the word so we can help more women lose body fat, build muscle, reach their goals, and feel insanely confident. And the only way we can do that is if you rate, review, and share this podcast. So the single thing I ask you to do is leave a review. It will take you 10 seconds, and it will mean the absolute world to me and may change the world of someone else.

So many people think that you have to change the result, but the results aren't the problem. What really needs to change are the systems that cause those results. So for example, you want to change your body. Your body isn't the problem. What got you to that body are the systems that cause the body you have, and those systems are what need to change.

Yo, yo, yo. What is going on, my friends? Welcome back to The WarriorBabe Show with Nikkiey Stott, co-founder of WarriorBabe. On this podcast, we talk about mindset, methodologies, and tactics that will help you lose body fat, build muscle, be strong, and feel insanely confident. I am your host, Nikkiey Stott.

Welcome to today's episode, episode 133, where we're going to dive into one of my favorite topics. I've talked about it before on the podcast, I think it was episode number two, and I'm like, yo, I've got to bring this back. I talk about this in our VIP community. I host our community call with our WarriorBabe VIPs. We've got about 1,800 women inside that program right now. And a couple weeks ago, this is a topic that I brought to them, and I was like, you know what? I need to bring it back to the podcast, because it's actually the perfect time of year to bring it back.

We're moving into the third month of the new year, and so I think it's a really good time to think about the way that you are thinking about your goals. So what I'm going to talk about today is I want you guys to actually forget about your goals and focus on your systems instead.

Let's speak to the ones that may not be where they wanted to be three months into the new year, or coming into the third month, and you're hyper-focused on the goal, right? Like losing the weight. You're so focused on the progress pictures and you're so focused on getting that result. You're like, oh my God, summer's a couple months away, I need this result right now. You are so attached to this result. And so what I would say to those of you that aren't where you want to be right now is that you need to think about your approach differently.

What you need to focus on is the systems that you are implementing on a day-to-day basis. Are those systems in alignment with getting you to that goal? Think about it like this. Goals are about the result that you want to achieve. Systems are about the processes that lead you to those results. So your goal might be, like I just mentioned, to lose body fat, to build muscle, to see the number go down on the scale.

Your system is eating right. Your system is tracking the macros. Your system is consistently, on a weekly basis, doing things like tracking macros, eating right, drinking your water, getting your workout in, getting enough sleep, and getting your workouts done in a way that also works with your schedule. So maybe the first month of the new year, you were going six days a week and you're like, this is not realistic for my schedule right now.

And you've got to pull it back and be realistic with yourself and say, OK, I'm going to get into the gym four days a week, and that works for my schedule. Those are your systems. Figuring that stuff out is your system. So why you aren't where you thought you would be right now is because you're inconsistent in one of those things. You're inconsistent with your systems, but you're so hyper-focused on that goal. That goal is not going to happen until you get consistent with the systems, until you build and develop and focus on the systems instead and detach yourself from that goal.

You're going to get to that goal when these systems are in place. If you're not where you thought you would be coming into March, there are so many problems, so many frustrations, so many bad narratives in your brain. You spend so much time thinking about those goals and not enough time designing and getting better at the systems. You're so hyper-focused on, I need to lose 10 pounds.

But then if you're not there by March, you're like, why am I not there? And then you're blaming something outside of yourself: the program, the weather, I don't know. But what really needs to be blamed is yourself. You need to take ownership of it. You're not being consistent in some realm of your day-to-day systems. Point blank.

OK, so there are four specific things that I want to talk about in this episode today. I almost feel like I just want to continue on that rant, but I'm going to bring it back, and I'm probably going to rant inside of these four things. There are four reasons why you need to forget about the goals.

If you've listened to this before, I hope this is just music to your ears right now. Or it's like, oh, damn, I needed to hear this again. You've heard me talk about this before and this is resonating with you the most right now. Light bulbs are going off and you're going to do something after you get off this podcast.

That is literally all that I hope and ask for. You get off the podcast, you learn something new, and you go and implement it. You go and take action on it, because you're not going to get the goals you want to accomplish with inaction. You're not going to get them by listening to 133 episodes of my podcast and doing nothing about it. So with love, please take something away from this podcast today and go implement it.

OK, number one. One of the reasons why you should forget about your goals and focus on your systems instead is this: winners and losers have the same exact goals. And guys, you probably hear Maverick in the background right now. I'm being a real human. He is playing with a toy.

What I'm taking this from is the book Atomic Habits, and I'm bringing this full circle. If you have not read the book, I would highly recommend that you do. These are some of my favorite things in the first few chapters. So number one, winners and losers have the same goals. Successful and unsuccessful people share the same goals.

You and I have the same goals. People who sign up for programs have the same goals. So why do some win and why do some lose? Why do some get amazing results and others don't? If you're signing up for a program, you literally have access to the same thing that the winner has access to. So why do the losers lose? You are a part of the same thing.

What I used as an example on our VIP call: we have 40 coaches on our team, and each of those coaches has an individual roster. On one coach's roster, there are some amazing winners. And then there are some losers that are inactive. They get into the program, they don't do anything with it, and then they get mad at us because the program didn't work. You didn't work the program. I just want to nail that into your brains. You actually have to do some work. And like I said, there are some winners on these rosters that are winning. Why are they winning? Goals can't be what differentiates winners from losers.

You all have the same goals. You and I have the same goal. So goals can't be what differentiates it. It's the systems that you implement that make all of the freaking difference. The winners on these coaches' rosters are implementing and building upon their systems. They are getting better at their systems. They are listening to their coach. They are checking in with their coach. They're doing what their coach is telling them to do. They're tracking their macros. They're learning their macros. They're learning that they need more protein. They're getting their workouts in, four days a week, three days a week, five days a week.

They're doing the work. They're implementing their systems. They're shutting down at night and not looking at their phones before they go to bed so they can get good quality sleep, because sleep is an important recovery factor. They are doing the things in a consistent manner. And if they fail, they're looking at it as an opportunity: OK, what can I change to do better next time?

I'm going to slow my talking down because I'm talking very fast right now, but this stuff gets me hyped up. I say this with love, but I also want to get through to you. You can have all the things that the winners have. You just have to commit. You have to commit to the journey that you signed up for, the money that you invested into a program. You have to commit for yourself to do this type of work. And you have to recognize: OK, I have this goal, but I'm not going to get to that goal unless I implement these things Nikkiey's talking about right now, the systems. Implementing them will make all of the difference.

Hey, I just want to drop a huge appreciation to you guys listening to the show. It means a lot. I hope you're enjoying it, and there's so much more to come. If you are enjoying it, hit the subscribe button. I'd appreciate that tons, and it would help this podcast reach others who need to hear these messages too.

The winners win because they do the program consistently, where the others are inconsistent. Here's an example. Winners go Monday to Sunday. Losers go Monday to Friday and take the weekends off. And I say this with love. If this is you and you're wondering why results are taking longer and you're not seeing the results you want, we're going into the third month of the new year and you're asking, why am I not where I want to be? And you're somebody who takes the weekends off. You're only a Monday through Friday person, and on the weekends you self-sabotage. You drink alcohol, you go out with friends, you overeat, X, Y, and Z. You're going out to restaurants Saturday and Sunday, you're not working out, and you're not paying attention to your nutrition.

You're not making choices. You're not saying no to things. That is why you are where you are right now. And the same person who signed up for the same program on January 1st, or made the commitment to themselves, is so much further along because they are going Monday through Sunday and they are getting uncomfortable by saying no to certain things. They're removing certain things from their life. They're choosing food options that serve their goals. That's a winner's mentality. Winners take action. Then they optimize their systems to support themselves, their lifestyle, and the advancement of their goals.

And then losers. Again, guys, I say this with so much freaking love. I am a tough love person. I worked with hundreds and hundreds of women in my coaching era, and I created some amazing transformations. Now I get to coach our coaches to do the same things. But I did it because I said things that were uncomfortable, but were also very true and got right to the point. It was the things these clients needed to hear.

They don't need the fluff. Well, some of them do. Some of them need a sandwich approach: a positive, then the 'we need to work on this,' then a positive close-out. But some of them just need it straight: yo, Nikkiey, say it to me straight. And I'm like, cool, I'm going to say it to you straight. You need to do better. You need to be more consistent. You need to follow through. You need to go Monday to Sunday. You need to have some uncomfortable conversations where you're saying no to some alcohol. And you need to take responsibility for it. So when I say losers, I'm talking about the inaction.

Those are the ones who aren't taking action. And the excuses as to why they can't support achieving their goals: I don't have enough time, or I'm too busy. Literally, guys, the next time you say those words out of your mouth, I don't have enough time, I'm too busy, just tell yourself that you're not making it a priority. Because that's exactly what you're doing. And what the winners do is make it a priority.

So that's number one. Winners and losers have the same goals. You literally have the same goals, so goals can't be what differentiates it. Winners win because they implement systems that get them to their goals, they take action on those systems, and they optimize their systems. Whereas losers get submerged by inaction. They get submerged by excuses. They get submerged by a narrative in their brain of, I don't have enough time, I'm too busy.

Trust me on that one. Nobody is busier than a mom I used to coach who has four kids, two sets of twins. You can watch the YouTube video of her journey on our WarriorBabe YouTube channel. Two sets of twins at the age of four. And later on in her journey, she got diagnosed with cancer. That's not in that YouTube video. But now she's back in WarriorBabe, and she's still making it happen. So please don't tell me you don't have enough time, and please don't tell me that you're too busy, because I will fire right back with that story. If you want it that bad, you will make it happen. And you have to commit to yourself to make it happen.

The next thing, number two: the reason you need to stop thinking about goals and focus on systems is because achieving a goal is only a momentary change. Think about it like this. You're not happy with your body, right? I'll use New Year's, or even going into the third month of the new year. You're not happy with your body. And then all of a sudden, you find a new plan, and you get all of this amazing energy to make a change. For now.

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But if you maintain the same habits of inconsistency... You get all this momentum at the beginning, right? And maybe this is you right now. You have all of this exciting effort at the beginning of the new year to do all the things, to change all the things. And you do change all the things, and you make a change for the time being. But then, bam, February 1st comes. There are stats on this: New Year's brings a ton of resolutions into the gym and gyms are packed, and then come March and April, it's back to normal. What happens is that people maintain the same habits of inconsistency.

They're eating badly, they're not eating enough, they're fearing carbs, they're not getting to the workouts they promised themselves in the new year, they're not following through on their workout schedule, blah, blah, blah. Because you're only focused on the goal, you're not focused on the consistent action of eating better, loving carbs, getting your workout in. The habits of inconsistency creep back in, and what got you into the unhappy situation to begin with will soon make you unhappy again.

If all you're focused on is losing weight or stepping on the scale and seeing the number go down, honestly, that's a superficial goal. Can you get deeper with yourself? Can you tell yourself the reason why you're doing this? Do you have a reason that you want to show up on a regular basis? Side note: whenever I asked clients I worked with, why do you want to do this, they'd say, I want to lose weight and I want to look good in a bikini.

I'm like, cool, that's very superficial. Can we get a little bit deeper than that? Can you tell me why you want to do this? And they're like, well, I grew up with my mom, who went diet after diet after diet and then gained weight every single time, and I don't want to do that for my kids. I'm like, cool, we're getting deeper here. Or, intimacy is lacking, and I want intimacy to be better with my partner. Amazing, let's keep going. I want to be a role model. All these things. That's deeper. Anyway, I got a little sidetracked there.

But sooner or later, if you're only focused on a goal and you're unhappy with your body, you start a new program, but you're not fully committed to it and you fall back into the inconsistencies again, you're soon going to get to the point where you're unhappy again. And so you're left chasing the same outcome because you never changed the system behind it. Did you hear me say that if you maintain the same habits of inconsistency, you're soon going to be left where you were? You were chasing the outcome. You're attached to the goal, but you never focused on changing the systems instead.

You never built the habits that would support your goals. Instead, you stayed the same and expected a different outcome. So many people think that you have to change the result, but the results aren't the problem. What really needs to change are the systems that cause those results. So for example, you want to change your body. Your body isn't the problem. What got you to that body is how you were eating, whether you do or don't exercise, your sleep schedule, not drinking enough water. The list goes on.

What got you to that body are the systems that cause the body you have, and those systems are what need to change. Does that make sense? Everyone thinks that the results have to change. In your example, you want to change your body, but your body is not the problem. The systems that caused you to get that body are the problem: not eating right, how you're eating, not exercising, not getting enough sleep, being highly stressed, X, Y, and Z. Those are what need to change.

Eating right, working out, getting enough sleep: those are the systems. When you solve problems at a results level, you only solve them temporarily. It's why people yo-yo. This is what I was going to say a second ago. This is why people yo-yo through different plans and programs. Six weeks to change the result, but after the six weeks are up, the weight comes right back on. In order to improve for good, in order to improve for the long game, and I say this is the game you are playing, this is your health, you want it to be good for the long term, you need to solve problems at the systems level.

Number three. This one hit home for a couple of WarriorBabes when I was on this call sharing this information with them a couple weeks ago. Goals restrict your happiness. Everyone thinks, and I even fell victim to this at the beginning of my journey, that once I reach this goal, I will be happy.

Once I have my dream body, I can be happy. Once I lose 20 pounds, I can be happy. Once I lose 50 pounds, I can be happy. Once I look better in my bikini, I can be happy. With that goal, mentally, you are continuously putting your own happiness off until you reach that goal. So goals create this either-or conflict. You achieve it and you're successful, or you fail and you're disappointed.

And I want to say this loud and clear: it's unlikely that your actual path through your journey will match exactly the progress you had in mind when you set out. What I mean by that is, everyone signs up for a program and says, in three months, I'm going to lose 20 pounds, and I can be happy when I get to that point. And then you don't get to that point. Because, as I'm saying, your actual path through your journey may not match exactly the progress you had in mind out of the gate.

That happens more often than not. And at that point, you now consider yourself a failure and you're disappointed. It creates this either-or effect. So develop a systems-first mentality. Fall in love with the process. At the point of signing up for a program, recognize that you're falling in love with yourself, because you made a decision to do something for yourself. You fall in love with the process at that point.

And if you can keep your mind focused on that type of narrative rather than the product, you don't have to wait to give yourself permission to be happy. Beautiful. So if there's any one of these you're going to focus on after this podcast: right now, be happy. Wherever you are in your journey, you've made a decision to be here at this moment. Be grateful for where you are. If there are things that need to change, take ownership of them and change them.

And develop a systems-first mentality. Fall in love with the process rather than the product.

And then the last one. We touched on this a little bit in number two, but the goal-oriented mind creates the yo-yo effect. Here's a good example. Think about runners who work hard for months on end, ones who are training for marathons or half marathons or triathlons or 50K ultras or 100K this.

They train for months on end, but as soon as they cross the finish line, they stop training. Maybe not the avid runners. But a lot of people love to do half marathons. They kick it into gear: I'm going to sign up for this because I need to do this. And as soon as they cross the finish line, they stop training. Or, like I said earlier, it's six weeks to this with online programs, and then the results stop. The goal is no longer there to motivate them.

So they have this goal of running a half marathon. They train for it. And they're so attached to this goal, because they're oriented on it, that when it's done, they stop training. The goal isn't there anymore. This is why people revert back to all of their old habits after accomplishing a goal. This is why people gain back all of their weight after they finish a six-weeks-to-this program or an eight-week challenge: they didn't get the systems down pat.

They were so oriented on the goal and the finish line, but there is no freaking finish line, my friends. If you are working to optimize your health and to build more muscle and to be the best you for longevity, you're going to do that to your dying day. So you might as well take on the systems right now that help you get there, and develop them, get used to them, build upon them and change your lifestyle. It's a lot to unpack. But if that's something you want to do and you really want to be healthy, that's what you have to do.

The purpose of setting goals, guys, is to win the game. It's to cross the finish line. The purpose of building systems is to continue playing the game. It's to continue playing the game of life. It's to continue to play the game of being healthy. There is no finish line. True long-term thinking is goalless thinking. It's not about any single accomplishment. It's about the cycle of endless refinement and continuous improvement along your journey.

If you want better results, forget about setting goals. This doesn't sound sexy, because everything in the fitness industry is six weeks of this, eight weeks of this, 21 weeks of this. You know what happens with WarriorBabe? WarriorBabes sign up for a year. One year. 12 months. I am setting realistic expectations out of the gate with our clients by having them sign up for a year, because that may well be what it takes to get somewhere with building habits and building systems, and then along the way seeing the results happen.

Forget about setting goals. Focus on your systems instead. I promise you the whole journey is going to be so much more fun and so much more rewarding. When you're building systems and then looking at the results you're getting from them, you can be so damn proud of yourself for implementing and getting better at the systems on a day-to-day basis, because it all compounds over months and years and decades.

All right, my friends. So, the last one I just talked about: goal-oriented mindsets create a yo-yo effect. Goals restrict your happiness. Achieving a goal is only a momentary change. And winners and losers have the same goals. Successful and unsuccessful people have shared goals. So in all of those things, the systems are what matter. The systems are the processes that will get you to those goals. The goals are just the results. That's it. How are you going to get the results? You're going to get them by implementing and nailing down your systems.

So, my friends, with that being said, I hope you enjoyed this podcast. Please get off this podcast and go implement whatever words resonate with you the most. And I would highly appreciate it if you left a review. I love reading the feedback you have about this podcast, how it's changing your world, how it's changing your lives, how the insights and knowledge are next level.

And that you are implementing the things I'm sharing. I love reading that. So please, just take 30 seconds after this podcast and go leave a review. I would highly appreciate it. Thanks so much. See you next time.

Real quick. The only ask I could ever have of you guys is to help spread the word so we can help more women lose body fat, build muscle, reach their goals and feel insanely confident. And the only way we can do that is if you rate, review and share this podcast. So the single thing I ask you to do is leave a review. It will take you 10 seconds and it will mean the absolute world to me and may change the world of someone else.