How To Be Confident As F*ck

00:00Real quick, the only ask I could ever have of you guys is to help spread the word so we can help more women lose body fat, build muscle, reach their goals, and feel insanely confident. And the only way we can do that is if you rate, review, and share this podcast. So the single thing I ask for you to do is if you could leave a review. It will take you 10 seconds, and it will mean the absolute world to me and may change the world of someone else. So embrace that mindset of constant improvement and seek out opportunities that challenge you.

00:32You guys, by doing hard things, you unlock your full potential and discover your inner strength and realign and regain your personal power. Yo, yo, yo. What's up, you guys? Welcome back to The WarriorBabe Show. Or if you are new, welcome to The WarriorBabe Show with Nikki Stott, co-founder of Warrior Babe. And on this podcast, we talk about mindset, methodologies, tactics that will help you lose body fat, build muscle, be strong, and feel insanely confident.

01:06I am your host, Nikki Stott. And guys, welcome to episode number 58, where today I'm going to talk to you guys about all of the things about how to be confident as fuck. So that latter half of my opening statement, right, where on this podcast, we talk about how to feel insanely confident. That is what I'm going to bring to the table today. And what, it's Monday, right? So what better way to kick off this week with talking about how to be confident and the strategies I feel like I've learned throughout the years that you guys can now take today and start implementing.

01:41And then by the end of the week, you can look back and be like, damn, I started working on this a little bit more or, you know, I became more aware of this or I showed up a little bit better this week. And by the end of the week, you can be like, I'm feeling good. And if there's anything that I hope that you guys do is just take these things and these strategies and these tactics and continue to implement them. Because having confidence within yourself, you guys, is such a powerful characteristic. It's such a powerful skill set. And it just emphasizes you more as a human being, right?

02:19And so, you know, when you walk into the room and you have confidence swag, people see that. When you're in conversations and you are, you know, uniquely sharing your opinions or you have a bold stance in a conversation or you make people feel, you know, you make people feel confident. That is your confidence, like, pouring into other people and they see that. And if there's anything that I want you guys to learn, because I feel like I really, you know, you're not born with confidence.

02:54You have to build the confidence within yourself. And it is a skill set. Just like I say, macros is a skill set that will serve you for the rest of your life. If you can work on bettering your self-confidence, that is a skill set that will serve you for the rest of your life. In every type of situation you're in in life, whether it be your friends, your husband, your partner, your coworkers, your work environment, your kids, your family, everything. That confidence is. It's such like it's such a cool thing to have.

03:27It's sometimes hard to explain, like, you know, the feeling that confidence gives, but I hope I just portrayed it that way. And then today I want to give you some tactics that you guys can, you know, learn how to build more confidence within yourself. Okay. Because literally through all of the years of my existence and, like, you know, putting myself out on social media back in, like, 2017, really 2018 is when I really started putting myself out there a little bit more. And, man, holy shit, that was scary as fuck.

03:58But now, like, for example, I was just at Restore Hyper Wellness, and this is, like, a little off-topic story. It's all on topic, but a little bit veering off of me wanting to get into the tactics. But really quick, just to help paint the light for the rest of the conversation, right? I'm in Restore Hyper Wellness. We're doing a Q&A for this recent thing that I was doing. I'm going to share with it more in later podcasts. But, like, I'm filming in front of people, right, on my story. And, you know, the woman I was filming with is, like, man, how do you do that?

04:29I was, like, yo, this is, like, years of fucking up, showing up, fucking up, showing up, and being okay with myself when I mess up and not beating myself up. And she was, like, you just, like, wing through that. I'm, like, trust me, there's times, like, that I get on my story, and I had to delete it because I don't like it. Or, you know, it's not really, like, I'm showing up differently. It's not my authentic self. So, you know, through the years of me showing up to social media and being in front of a camera, it has gradually gotten better since 2017.

05:04I remember my first video. And maybe, though, that'd be so cool to share with you guys, you know, maybe sometime in the future. But my first video, I was so nervous. And I was, like, drinking coffee, repeating myself. You could feel the shakes in my voice. It's actually pretty funny, but it's so cool to look back on. Because, like, I have just naturally gotten better because I worked on this skill set for myself. And these things I'm going to share with you today are some of the major things that I have taken away when I look back and be like, Oh, how did I gain confidence in myself?

05:36It's literally these seven things that I have been able to pull out that I've been able to work on, right? And have been able to nail down in the last, what is that, like, five, six years? We're really showing up more. And this is how I've personally built up the self-confidence in myself. So I hope that you can take away some of these tactics. And you can start either becoming more aware of them if you're already doing them. Or working on them a little bit harder so that, you know, you can really build that confidence muscle stronger.

06:10Okay? So let's dive right into it. Number one is avoid people who make you feel like crap about yourself. Like, this one's really, like, I'm going to say that probably all of them are very important. But avoiding people who make you feel like crap about yourself is a huge, huge, like, it's just funny. I'm pausing because there's this awesome statement that I heard watching the new season of Selling Sunset, you guys.

06:41And G, Chrishell's girlfriend, was like, yo, just stay in your peace bubble and don't let anybody pop it. And I was just like, oh, my God, I fucking love that statement. You have to surround yourself with positive, uplifting individuals. That is so crucial for your well-being. And I want you to not hesitate to distance yourself from people who constantly bring you down or belittle yourself. You deserve to be around individuals who appreciate and value you as you and as a human that you are.

07:15And even all of the flaws that you have and the things that you're working on, you deserve to be appreciated by that. You deserve to be valued for who you are. So you need to surround yourself with those who inspire you, who support your growth and uplift everything that you are about. Right. So, like, if you are your self-esteem, you guys, and your mental health is so fucking precious. And if you have somebody that's tearing you down or making you feel like crap, that's only going to continue to add more toxicity to your life.

07:48It's not going to help you in a positive manner to support your growth, to inspire you. And so if you have toxic people who hinder your personal development and your own personal happiness, you need to remove them from your life. You need to create distance from them in your life because you need to prioritize your well-being by removing any and all negative influences that do not support you. And I know I've shared this in previous podcasts where, like, when I was first starting my journey, I had friends, family members who didn't get what I was doing, who didn't like what I was doing, who didn't accept what I was doing.

08:27And family members are a little bit hard to just, like, you know, completely remove yourself from because they're your family. But for those ones, what I recommend is just creating distance and also communicating with them the things. And that can sometimes be hard to do because a lot of humans don't want to be involved in confrontation. And so communicating with them, though, how you're feeling and why X is so important to you for you to accomplish. And then anybody that's a friend that doesn't support you, I honestly would say, like, get them out of your life as soon as possible.

09:05Like, it's probably easier said than done. But you can start by creating distance and then you can, you know, start to just you'll realize by you creating distance that it'll just naturally phase out of your life. You guys aren't in alignment. And that is OK, because guess what? You're going to meet friends who are in alignment with your journey and are doing the things that you are doing to as well. You're going to form a mutual connection that way and they're going to be a part of your life. It's OK to have different friends in different phases of your life. OK, but make sure that those friends inspire you.

09:39They support your growth and they uplift you as a human being. OK, so number one is avoid people who make you feel like crap about yourself. Number two is don't fall into the comparison trap. And I know I've talked about this before, because comparing yourself to others is a never ending cycle that leads to your own self-doubt and your own like dissatisfaction of yourself. And I want you to remember that everybody's journey is and have this understanding that everybody's journey is so unique and your own path is worthy of what you are going to experience and your experiences alone.

10:22OK, and this was actually an upcoming podcast on Wednesday that you guys are going to listen with Hannah Eden. I absolutely loved when she spoke to this a little bit in like the latter half of the podcast where sometimes, you know, connecting with somebody that has had the same experience and finding out their their experience is can be sometimes a fault. Right. Because you do end up comparing yourself to that experience.

10:52Like it's like, for example, like you go to Sally, who is losing weight and you ask what her experience is about and she fucking hates it because maybe she's doing it the wrong way. And so you attach that narrative and that story to your own experience. And now it's a mixture of Susie's experience and your experience without it just being your entire experience. Right. And so that's why I like comparing yourself. It just can lead to not even your true experience, not even your true story, but self-doubt.

11:24And so I want you to remember that everybody's journey is completely different and everybody has their own experience. And I want you to focus on your own progress and your personal growth instead of measuring yourself against others. And remember that comparing yourself to others is just it is completely unfair. It is completely inaccurate and of a way to assess your accomplishments in your own journey. And your value is not determined by how you measure up to somebody else's, but by the way that your qualities are and the unique experience that you make for yourself and who you are.

12:05Okay. So it's just the same thing with social media and popping on social media and being and looking at somebody's body and being like, man, I wish I had that body. But that person could be doing it all wrong. Right. That's why social media is someone can be a trap sometimes. It's like, you know, it's okay to look up to people and be inspired by people, but just make sure you do not compare yourself to their journey because they have their own personal struggles or they may not be going about it the right way. You have your own experience. You have your own self-worth. You have the unique qualities and experience that will make up who you are.

12:39Hey, hey, just want to drop a huge appreciation to you guys listening to the show. It means a lot. I hope you guys are enjoying it and there's so much more to come with it. If you are enjoying it, hit the subscribe button. I'd appreciate that tons. And also it would help this podcast reach others who need to hear these messages, too. Thanks so much, guys. Let's get back to the show. Number three is accept compliments without deflecting. I feel like this one is so freaking hard for people to do. And I was once there, too, as well. It's like somebody says, wow, your hair looks nice or that outfit is amazing.

13:12And you go, oh, this took forever to do. It took like an hour to do. It's like that is not the way you should respond. OK, or someone says that your outfit and that's what we all do. It's just a natural human instinct. I don't know why, but it is. And I've been there. Or like you look your body looks amazing. You're like, oh, God, I'm just so fucking tired today. Right. You're like the outfit looks good. I'm like, yeah, but it's tight here on my love handles. My love handles are popping out. I know you've been there, you guys.

13:45And me, too. But when someone compliments you, embrace it, like fully absorb it. Allow yourself to acknowledge and internalize the positive feedback that you are receiving. I cannot tell you, especially from somebody who gives somebody a compliment and being more aware of this and that person deflects. It hurts because I'm like, girl, you look fucking awesome. And then they go when they go into a negative state. And I'm like here and they're here and they're deflecting my energy to them.

14:16And, you know, it's an energy sucker, to be honest. But I know that they're experiencing their own thing in their own world. So I don't try to, you know, I'm just like, OK, you know. But for you, remember that and become more aware of this. If this would be the one that, like I said at the beginning of the podcast, that you become more aware of in the coming days of your week and weeks and months. This is avoid undermining compliments or deflecting them with self-deprecating remarks.

14:48OK, instead, respond with the simple thank you. And sometimes, like I said, that's so hard to do. But respond with a simple thank you. When somebody says, girl, you look good and be like, oh, thank you. Or like what I do is like, man, I so appreciate that. Right. Find what feels good for you to give a sincere remark back of an uplifting response. Right. And generally appreciate the kind words that are coming your way. When you do that and you recognize and you accept these compliments, it's not a sign of arrogance, but a reflection of like your own self-respect and your own self-assurance.

15:27So embrace a positive feedback that builds your confidence and reinforces your own self-worth, you guys. So every single time somebody says something nice about you or they say like a beautiful thing about your hair, your spirit or your clothes or the way your body is looking and the results you're getting. Say thank you and then generally appreciate those words. That is the quickest way, quickest feedback loop to have self-respect, to build self-respect, to have self-assurance of yourself and to build your confidence.

16:03Hands down. OK, so I challenge you in the coming days and coming weeks and coming months, whenever anybody says anything nice to you, say thank you. OK, so that's number three. Number four is get competent. Get competent, you guys. Invest. And this one's sometimes hard to do, too, as well, because not everybody is aware yet of what they are excited about doing or have passions to pursue. But if there's anything that sparks your interests, I would say always follow your interests and get competent.

16:38Invest in your personal and professional growth by acquiring new skills and knowledge. Like strive to become competent areas that align with your interests and your goals. Follow your interests. This is exactly what I did with fitness. I was in the health care industry before this. I was in nursing. I worked in a long term facility for five years and then the ER for four years. So I was in health care for almost 10 years of my life before I followed my interest of fitness and pursued a life career in fitness,

17:11which a lot of people thought was not possible. It is so truly possible, especially if you get competent. And you invest in yourself and acquiring new skills. I invested so much. I wiped out my bank account to put towards gaining knowledge and new skills in fitness. So there's this one. I like literally am. It's to my core. And I just want to preach this to everybody, because when you do that, you're embracing a growth type of mindset.

17:42And I think everybody is always wanting to grow within themselves. Like your spirit is always a fuller expression of yourself. And so embrace a growth mindset and see challenges as an opportunity for learning and improvement. Okay. Remember that like confidence and competence is built through practice and is built through a willingness to step outside of your comfort zone. Like for me, like jumping from health care and a very stable career as a nurse to fitness is a very uncomfortable thing to do.

18:18I got outside of my comfort zone in a huge way back in like 2017. Like I said, I wiped out my bank account, but I trusted in myself to follow through on these things. And I gained so much confidence by doing it that way. And so much confidence in something that is so natural for me to speak to and embody, which is fitness, health, nutrition, all of the things. Sometimes I don't even know where words come from in my brain when I'm asked a question about health and fitness, but they just come because I am so aligned with this passion of mine.

18:51And it's because I got competent and because I acquired all of these new tactics and skill sets and understanding and knowledge and I put it to work. So as you become more competent, you'll gain confidence in the self-accomplishment too as well. So it empowers you to tackle challenges head on and achieve success in areas that matter to you. And again, like I said, you have to align these things that you want to get competent in with your interests and your goals. And I will say this too, because at the beginning of the journey, you know, people want to get competent and think that all this stuff is going to turn around and be implemented into your life immediately.

19:25It's not. You have to apply patience along the way, which will then help you to even gain confidence even more within yourself because you're like, you know, this is an instant gratification type of thing where you're going to start acquiring this new skill. It's going to give you immediate results and immediate feedback. And you're, you know, feeding that loop. It's like, this is going to take you some time. Learning new skills and acquiring new knowledge is going to take you some time. But if there's anything that aligns with your interests and your goals that you absolutely love doing, whether it be sales, business, being an entrepreneur, getting into fitness, getting into nutrition, learning all the things about that, get competent.

20:02Learn that skill better than anybody else possibly could. And you're going to have so much confidence in yourself by just doing that. So that's number four. Number five is do hard shit. Prove to yourself that you can do this, especially too with getting competent. Pushing yourself to take on challenging tasks and overcome obstacles is essential for personal growth. If you are just decent, if you are just getting by, if you are just comfortable in your day to day, you're not going to fulfill on the confidence meter as much as you possibly can.

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21:42You have to push yourself to prove yourself that you can do hard shit. Like I love the hashtag do hard things. Okay, because when you face difficult situations, when you demonstrate resilience within yourself, when you demonstrate determination and the ability to conquer your fears, each time you do that and you tackle something difficult and you come out on the other side, you prove to yourself that you are capable of more than you thought possible. So for me, like when I left that career to jump into fitness and then started doing the things I never knew existed at the time

22:17and got into the online space and was like, holy shit, this is like mind blowing to the fact that I can make a career out of this and a sustainable career more than the career that I was in. And be able to live in a way that I never even honestly, like I imagined it, but I didn't think it was possible. And we all have that too as well. But when you do and tackle hard shit and you try new things and you get uncomfortable, and then you come out on the other side, you prove to yourself that you are capable of more than you thought possible. And that is so fucking true.

22:49And I can speak to that from that experience and also in the fitness, completely changing my body composition. Like I proved to myself that I could do it and I was capable. And it was more than I thought possible of what my body could ever look like. Okay, this builds so much confidence within yourself, you guys, and expands your comfort zone. Once you do something hard, the next thing that seems equally as hard is not as hard. And then it just gradually gets easier and easier and easier with the things that you want to try and do. I promise you.

23:19So the first thing that feels really fucking hard, just do it. Because the second time that, you know, you put those two new, that hard thing together, with the next thing that's hard, it's not going to feel, and they seem equally as hard, it's not going to feel as hard. And I promise you, the things that look hard are easier and easier to you as you continue to conquer hard things and prove to yourself that you can do hard things. Like, it's so cliche, but it's so true. So the growth that you want happens outside of your comfort zone.

23:51So embrace that mindset of constant improvement and seek out opportunities that challenge you. You guys, by doing hard things, you unlock your full potential and discover your inner strength and realign and regain your personal power. It's so true. Okay? So like, if you think macros is hard, let's pull it back. You think macros is hard? Do hard things. Prove to yourself that you can fucking track the macros.

24:22Okay? If you feel like, you know, squatting X amount of weight is hard, do the hard shit. Prove to yourself that you can. Because, perfect example, you do X amount of weight under the bar for a squat. Let's just use that as an example. And then the next time you try and go do 10 pounds heavier, it may not, you already squashed something that you didn't think that you could do. And so when you try and come up against 10 pounds heavier, it's going to be a little bit easier. You know what I mean?

24:53It's like equal is hard, but you feel confidence within yourself because you already squashed that first hard thing. And so coming in about 5 or 10 pounds heavier, you're like, all right, I got this. I can do it. And it just continues. Okay? So number 5 is do hard shit and prove to yourself that you can. Number 6 is prioritize yourself. Prioritize yourself. Because you fucking matter. There's so many moms, so many of you guys out there that put their family and their kids first.

25:24And then come 18 years later, you know, you did everything for them and you forgot to prioritize yourself. And so now you're catching up on 18 years. Your well-being, your dreams, your goals are so fucking important. And I want you to recognize that prioritizing yourself is not selfish, but necessary for a fulfilling life. If you put yourself first and you do all of these hard things, I'm telling you, and you get confident and you gain confidence within yourself. And, you know, you say thank you and you're trying all of these things now for yourself.

25:59You're going to be a role model for all of the people around you sooner rather than later. And so when you prioritize getting a workout in, when you prioritize eating well, you're taking care of your physical, your emotional, and your mental health. And so it's really important because people say they don't have enough time to go to work out because I got to take my kids somewhere. I got to cook dinner. Set boundaries and allocate the time for self-care and working out and eating right that recharge and rejuvenate you.

26:30That is so fucking important, you guys, when you allow the time to yourself in a day to get the things done that you want to that are in alignment with your well-being, your dreams, and your goals. You cannot pour from an empty cup. But by prioritizing yourself, you become better equipped to contribute positively to the people that are around you that matter to you and to your kids and to everybody. You'll be an inspiration if you can put yourself first. It's just like when people are on an airplane and they say, put your mask on first before you can help others.

27:05Seriously, prioritize yourself because you matter. Honor yourself. Set boundaries. Prioritize. Do all of those things that are in alignment with your well-being, your dreams, and your goals, you guys. It's so fucking important. Don't wait. And don't put other people first. Don't. Literally, if you need to hear from me, I don't care about your kids. I care about you because if you care about you as much as I care about you, then your kids are going to show better. Your kids are going to become better humans as long as you prioritize yourself first.

27:39And same with your family and same with your friends and same with your coworkers and same with everything else. You are going to believe confidence to those people that are around you. And then the last one is stop tearing yourself down. Replace self-criticism with self-compassion. Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would extend to a friend. Okay? Seriously, it's like if you were talking to a friend and you were tearing themselves down, that's just a reflection of what's going on inside of you.

28:13So I want you to challenge a negative self-talk and replace it with positive affirmations. Like just the same thing with somebody gives you a nice compliment and then you tear it down, you're tearing yourself down. Replace that with a thank you and a positive affirmation about yourself. Like someone says, wow, your hair looks really good. Thank you. Yeah, I love it too. It looks great. I feel great. Right? It's just as easy as that. I know it's easier said than done, but with more practice and more trying all of these things, it will come more easier to you.

28:50Right? Even with like some of like the things I'm saying with just accepting a new gesture, that's a hard thing for people to do. Do the hard shit. Right? Okay? So I want you to, these are, those are the seven things. So stop tearing yourself down. Prioritize yourself because you matter. Do a hard shit. Prove to yourself that you fucking can. Get competent. Accept compliments without deflecting. Do not fall into the comparison trap. And avoid people who make you feel like crap about yourself.

29:20If you start either becoming more aware of one of those things, I don't say, you know, go do all seven. Focus on one that you really want to work on and become more aware of it and start taking the opposite actions of what you're doing now so that you can gain more confidence within yourself. All of these things matter. These are all of the things that I feel like in the last five, six years of showing up for myself a little bit better and even being on social media and even just being around new people and meeting new people and, you know, my clients and our team.

29:56I feel like these seven things have been really, really important to my self-confidence and why I've been able to build and continue to build more confidence within myself. Because I stopped tearing myself down. I prioritized myself. I do hard shit. I got competent. I get competent on a daily basis. There's things that I have done the last year that I would have never fathomed to be doing in a healthcare field with building a business. And I've had to get competent in things. Do I suck at it at the beginning?

30:26Yes. Can I get better? Absolutely. That's what all about getting competent is. But as long as you don't give up on yourself, the only way you fail is if you quit, you guys. Okay. So get competent. And then, you know, I've accepted compliments without deflecting. I've gotten way better doing that. I don't fall into the comparison shop. I know that this is my own experience on life and I'm going to experience it different than somebody else. And if I have, I put up my peace bubble and I ain't letting anybody pop it. All right, you guys. And so work on these weekly, work on these daily, work on these in the months to come and years to come.

31:00And I promise you, if you start working on them today, tomorrow, next week, next month, these things will all compound to, you know, the next 10 years of your life. One year of your life, five years of your life, 10 years of your life. You will be fucking unstoppable. And so I want you to remember as I sign off today with you guys, you aren't born with confidence. It's a skill that you develop by working on it regularly. And you can work on this, one of those seven things to start and then work on another one and then work on another one.

31:31All right. And bettering yourself, you guys, that's all that matters in life. That's all that matters in life. Prior to yourself, better yourself and make sure that you're following your interest in the things that you love and take pride in the confidence that you're building. All right, you guys. I hope that helped and I hope you enjoyed. And I'll see you guys in the next podcast. Peace out. Hey guys, real quick. If you're interested in taking your body to the next level, lose body fat, build more muscle, feel more confident. Do it alongside one of our 30 plus professional coaches.

32:03Work one-on-one with her to eliminate all of the guesswork that you may have. And all you need to do is just do the work that she tells you to do to get to those goals of yours. And to learn more, click the link below this podcast and apply to our VIP program right now.

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