Starting a Fitness Journey: 6 Things Women Should Know

Nikkiey: The journey that you are embarking on is so much more of a mental game than it is a physical game.

What's going on, you guys? Welcome to The WarriorBabe Show with Nikkiey Stott, co-founder and brand personality of WarriorBabe, where we talk about mindset, methodologies and tactics that will help you lose body fat, build muscle, be strong and feel insanely confident. I am your host, Nikkiey Stott, and welcome to episode number 27, where we're going to dive into another listener Q&A.

You guys know the drill by now if you've listened to the other Q&As from this podcast. I drop a question box on my Instagram story from time to time, asking you what questions you would want answered on this podcast that are worthy of long answers. So ask me your questions in that box. I'll take them if they're worthy of long answers and bring them to this podcast.

Typically I do two or three questions in one episode, but today it's a little bit of a different question and answer than what I've received before. So I'm going to stick to one question and one answer, because I really like this question a lot, and I feel like it can serve all of you, no matter where you're at in your journey. Specifically, this speaks to the beginning of someone's journey, but I think you could take these little golden nuggets I'm going to share with you no matter where you're at. It could be your beginning, it could be the middle, or you might need to pick it back up. Or you could be a vet, and you could still probably take one of these golden nuggets and apply it to your journey. It's a great question, which I'll say in a couple minutes, but I feel like this overarching theme is a little different, and it's going to serve you in so many ways.

All right, so the amazing question that got asked, and I know I built that up there for a second, was: what are some things that I wish I knew at the beginning of my journey? So it's a full experience story from what I've been through. I'm going to share it with you in hopes that some golden nuggets come from this, or you're like, oh my God, I've felt that before, I know what she's talking about, or I'm dealing with that right now. These are things I wish I knew at the beginning of my journey. Looking back now, eight years in, I feel like I could have accelerated a little bit more had I known these things.

So let's get into it. There are six different ones, and I'm going to elaborate on each one with some type of story or experience I've been through. And I'm sure you will resonate.

The first one you need to know is that most women will need to go through multiple phases of a cut, a reverse diet and a maintenance phase to achieve the goal of building more muscle and changing their body composition.

To share the experience, starting out, and I think I shared this in episode number one of the podcast, I thought that I'd hit a goal and my body would stay there. I was so naive to the whole transformation of a body. It's funny to laugh about now. But I was like, I hit this goal, my body will stay like this forever, no matter how much I eat, no matter what I do. No problem. Man, was I wrong. I yo-yoed for quite a bit until I wrapped my head, my understanding and my knowledge around these three concepts: a cut, a reverse and maintenance, and even a surplus. People call it bulking. I call it a build, because it's better for the mindset that way. It wasn't until I wrapped my head around the understanding and knowledge of these specific phases.

I'll elaborate on them deeper in another podcast, because there are differences that go with each one. There are different tactics, different outcomes and different goals for each one. So I'll cover that in another episode. But for the sake of this one, you need to know that if you want to change your body composition and you want to build muscle, you're going to need to go through multiple phases of a cut, a reverse diet, maintenance, a build, X, Y and Z. Multiple phases. Let me just say that again. Multiple phases.

I didn't fully put that into practice with consistent effort until about two and a half years after accomplishing my first transformation. So I yo-yoed for quite some time. I shared my journey in podcast episode number one, so if you haven't listened to that one, definitely go check it out. It elaborates so much more on my journey, and I know you'll resonate with a lot of it. So I didn't fully put that into practice until I understood it more and had the knowledge around it. I wish I knew that at the beginning of my journey, because I would have saved two and a half years, essentially, of not doing it the right way.

If you want to build muscle and if you want to change the way your body looks, just think about that. I say this all the time. That is a lot to unpack. Change your body composition. I no longer look the way I looked eight years ago. Ain't no way. I look totally different. And it takes time. If you want to do that, you're not going to be in one caloric deficit, in one fat loss phase, in one cut. Will you achieve something with one cut? Yes, absolutely. But to keep changing the way your body looks, to keep building more, to keep doing all of that, it will take time. It's also going to take giving your metabolism a break, because you're not going to stay in one cut for the rest of your life. You're not going to stay at 1,500 calories for 10 years. I mean, some people have, but that's not the right way to do it. You want to eat at maintenance, especially if you want to build muscle and especially if you want to change your body composition. And you've got to do that multiple times.

So that's number one. Most women will need to go through phases of a cut, a reverse diet and maintenance to achieve the overarching goal of building more muscle and changing their body composition. Just accept that right now. It ain't going to be one fat loss cut. It ain't going to be "I lose 20 pounds." If you want to build muscle, you've got to go up into maintenance and then up into a lean building phase.

I can even speak to one of my clients, Cheryl Beaver. Badass woman right there. She's 60 years old, and we're now in probably her third or fourth cut. She's gone through three builds so far working with me, and we've been working together for about three years now. I don't take any new clients, but we have amazing coaches on our team who work with clients. Point blank, her body composition is completely different. Even at 60 years old, man, has she gained so much muscle. It's unreal. So she's gone through multiple phases.

So please know that. Of all the six I'm going to share with you, this is the main one, the main one of them all. Understand that. Accept that. And have fun with it. Go through multiple phases.

If you do want to learn more about the phases, this is everything WarriorBabe is about. This is exactly what we teach in our Blueprint course and the education modules, and what our coaches put their one-on-one clients through. If you don't want to have to know how to do all of those different phases and you'd rather have someone do it for you, the VIP program is where it's at. If you want to learn this yourself, because everybody's body is unique and you want to make it sustainable for you, the Blueprint course is the education. If you're an education geek and you want to learn all of this, that's literally what our entire Blueprint program is about, including all of the adjustments to your nutrition through each of those phases. Like I said, it's an in-depth conversation between each of those phases, but it's inside our courses. So that's number one.

Number two is that it's not just about appearance. While many people focus on fat loss for aesthetic reasons, it's also so freaking important for your overall health. Starting out, for sure, we all do this for fat loss and wanting to feel better in our skin, for the looks. There's nothing wrong with that, by the way. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. However, it's not what it's all about.

What you do now matters. What I did at 25, how I turned my life around from the habits I was stuck in to the new habits I created, will forever change the trajectory of my health for the rest of my life. At the beginning, a hundred percent, we all do it because we want to feel better, look better and feel more confident. But it's not all about that.

It is so important for your overall health to kick any bad habits, like not eating enough, or not having much muscle tone, before you hit a phase of life like menopause, where it's really important to strength train, because it literally paves the path of your future health trajectory. You could be in menopause and have never worked out a day in your life, and that's going to pave the path of where you are in 20 years. And I can tell you that's not going to be an optimal place to be in 20 years if you don't take care of yourself right now.

Since we're on this example, if you're in menopause and you decide to do something different at this point in your life, you decide to start strength training and turn around all of your bad habits, the path you go on from there is going to forever change your health trajectory for the rest of your life. You could be so strong at 70, 80 years old. If you make the decision now, what you do now matters for the rest of your health trajectory. So it's not just about looks. Awesome, cool, there's nothing wrong with that. But it's not all about that. It's so important for your overall health. So that's number two.

Number three: lifting weights will not make you bulky. Ladies, lifting weights is not going to make you look like a masculine She-Hulk.

Here's a funny story. I told you in episode number one that I hired a coach, because hiring a professional in the space saves you so much time. You're literally buying their knowledge and buying their failures, and they're going to help you get where you want to be 10 times faster. I shared that whole story there. But when I started working with him, I remember this so vividly. I was at his house the day I met him, sharing all of my goals. He had this dope gym in his basement with mirrors, and I'm looking at my physique, saying I want to change it, I want to build more muscle, I want to feel more confident, blah, blah, blah. And I freeze in my tracks and say, "But I don't want to get too bulky. I don't want to look like a man." I remember saying that. And I'm sure you have too. This is so common. Women are so afraid they're going to get bulky. I've heard this so many times.

Listen, women have lower testosterone levels than men do, so that makes it harder for us to bulk up, unless, and I joke about this, but actually it's not a joke, it's true: if you're taking steroids, then yeah, you're going to bulk up. You're going to look like a man. Your jawline is going to change. Your voice is going to get deeper. All that jazz, 100%. But unless you're taking the roids, ladies, you won't get as big as those boys, or as big as the ladies who do take the roids. I promise you. It's just not possible.

I'm 100% natural. I've been tested, polygraphed, peed in a cup, got that tested. Totally 100% natural. And I'm not bulky. I don't look like a man. Although, dude, I get some hate in the comments. This is actually a future thing I wish I knew before my journey. I get comments saying I take roids, that I look like a man, what juice are you on, yada, yada, yada.

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All right, let's get back to the show. Unless you have ample levels of testosterone, up to men's levels of testosterone, you will not bulk up like a man. If you have that, you will. I probably have slightly higher testosterone levels, which is why I've been able to put on as much muscle as I have in the last eight years. But since we have lower testosterone levels, it's harder for us to bulk up and look like a man. So touching the weights and strength training won't make you bulk up and look like a man, unless you decide to take steroids. So that's number three.

Hey, I just want to drop a huge appreciation to you guys listening to the show. It means a lot. I hope you're enjoying it, and there's so much more to come. If you are enjoying it, hit the subscribe button. I'd appreciate that tons, and it will also help this podcast reach others who need to hear these messages too. Thanks so much. Let's get back to the show.

Number four: it is way more of a mental game than it is a physical one. 110 percent, 150 percent. You know that a main pillar of this podcast is mindset, because the journey you are embarking on, even as a vet, is so much more of a mental game than it is a physical game. For sure, the workouts are super challenging. You go into the gym and it's totally challenging, the type of stimulus you're putting your body under. But it is nothing compared to the mental self-control and discipline needed to say no to the damn cookie you want when it's not in alignment with your macros, or when it doesn't fit where you're at in your fat loss calorie deficit. Or skipping a night out with friends because you know it's not going to help your mental game and your workout energy for the next day.

A challenging workout is challenging, and the physical component of this whole journey is challenging. But it is nothing compared to the mental self-control, the discipline, the willpower, all of the mental game it takes to say no, or to do things you probably don't want to do but need to do because they're going to help you get the results you want. Point blank, end of story. The mental game is way harder than the physical.

Here's a good story. When everybody around you is eating all of the food and you're over there with a packed lunch, that was me. Those were some of the hardest, yet also some of the most rewarding, moments, because that's where I really tapped into some high-vibe moments connected to my future self. We'd be standing in the ER break room, and everybody is eating pizza, donuts, all of the bad stuff. If you work in healthcare, you know your break rooms are just filled with junk. And I'm over there eating my packed meals, chicken, broccoli and rice, when I was competing. Even when I wasn't competing, I still packed healthy food, because the pizza and donuts just didn't fit into my day as much as the break room offered them. Those were some of the hardest moments. It required so much willpower to not take a donut, so much willpower to say no.

At first it was really hard. And then it got so much more rewarding, and so much easier, because of all the times I had to say no. I built that up. If there's anything from this journey I'm so grateful to have developed, it's self-control and discipline. It's helped build such a solid framework and foundation for my sustainable lifestyle: the ability to be in control of the mental game, and to be in control of self-control and discipline. So it is so much more of a mental game than it is a physical one. That was number four.

Number five is that people will judge you. People will judge you. Whether you're at the beginning of your journey, in the middle of your journey, or even a vet, man, you're being judged. I've talked about this in previous podcasts. You're being judged for what you're doing, for the way you eat, for the way you work out, for why you get up at 5 a.m. And again, let me remind you, it has nothing to do with you. It has to do with other people's awareness of themselves, because they wish they were doing what you're doing. But they will judge you. You will be judged.

Like I said, I get judged for the way I look. I look like a man, I'm too bulky, in some people's minds. And that's because they're thinking in terms of what they want. Everybody has an opinion. I say opinions are the cheapest commodities on earth. Everybody has a flock of opinions just waiting to be accepted by you. But if you can stay strong in a positive bubble, knowing this is the journey you're on and you're doing it for yourself and yourself only, not for the people with all the opinions or the people who wish they were doing what you're doing, if you can keep that positive bubble around you and not allow any of that to pop it, you will be golden. I highly recommend you keep that positive bubble around you and keep it strong, because, again, yes, you will be judged. Every aspect of your journey will get some type of criticism, some type of opinion, some type of judgment.

So stay strong. Stay strong. Find people who are doing what you're doing and get into that environment, that space they're in, because they're going to be way more accepting of you. You're going to accept yourself because you're accepted by them, and you're going to find more enjoyment with them, instead of with the people who just don't get what you're doing. So that's number five: people will judge you.

And then the last of the things I wish I knew at the beginning of my journey. I hope one of these things is helping you. Maybe you're resonating with one of them, or all of them. But I hope there's one golden nugget you can take away from this 20-minute podcast, even just five minutes of it, where you're like, damn, that hit home. I hope from the bottom of my heart that it changes your perspective.

Number six, and I definitely wish I knew this at the beginning of my journey, is to be mindful of who you look up to. Social media is the way of our day and age. Make sure the fitness accounts you are following make you feel more confident in yourself and not shameful. Make sure you feel inspired by them and not insecure, or that you don't find yourself comparing yourself to them. If you are comparing yourself, know that you can do it too. It should be a form of inspiration, not a form of "I'm insecure." So make sure the accounts you follow make you feel confident in yourself. They make you feel inspired. They make you feel like you can go and take this action too.

Pay attention to how you think and how you talk about yourself as a result of the people you look up to. That's so important, hands down, because there are so many fitness gurus out there who may not even feel confident or secure within themselves. So they're doing all of the wrong things to get a specific type of result, and then you're following them. You just have to make sure you're feeling confident, you're feeling inspired, and that the way you talk about yourself and think about yourself is a positive reflection of the people you follow.

So be mindful of the people you look up to while you're on your journey, and make sure they make you feel good and that you feel like you can go take the same type of action they took, with a positive outcome. Because there are some people and fitness gurus out there doing six days of training for two hours, or eating at some ratio, and really it's not the right way. Maybe they're insecure. They don't feel confident within themselves. Who knows? And there are also people who just say the wrong thing. So be mindful of the people you look up to. Make sure you feel confident. Make sure you feel inspired, because it's really important.

So those are six things I wish I knew at the beginning of my journey. I think, hands down, number one is the most important one. I'm going to run through them again.

Number one, you need to go through multiple phases of a cut, a reverse diet and maintenance to achieve your goal. Number two, it's not just about appearance. People focus on fat loss for aesthetics, but it's also important for your overall health. Number three, lifting weights will not make you bulky. Number four, it's more of a mental game than it is a physical game. Number five, people will judge you. And number six, be mindful of who you look up to.

All right, you guys, I hope you enjoyed this podcast. If you did, screenshot this podcast, write whichever one resonated with you the most, and tag me on social media. I would love to see that. All right, I'll see you in the next episode.

Real quick: the only ask I could ever have of you is to help spread the word so we can help more women lose body fat, build muscle, reach their goals and feel insanely confident. The only way we can do that is if you rate, review and share this podcast. So the single thing I ask is that you leave a review. It will take you 10 seconds, it will mean the absolute world to me, and it may change the world of someone else.