Why Most Women Quit Right Before Results Happen

00:00Confidence comes from staying when it's boring. I heard so many times over the last years of being in the industry, it's like women get their program for four weeks and by the fourth week they're bored. So what? If you stay through that and you don't go into the gym and say I'm going to do a different workout program this week, it's boring for a reason. When things are unclear, when progress isn't happening and you still stay and follow through, that's confidence being built. You stay when it's unclear. Hey you guys, what's going on? Welcome back to another episode of The WarriorBabe Show with your host, Nikkie Stott. And on these episodes, we talk about mindset, methodologies, and tactics that will help you lose body fat, build muscle, be strong, and feel insanely confident.

00:45So with today's episode, my friends, we are diving into number 327. And if you're listening to this in any part in January, maybe it's some, maybe it's the new episodes being released and you're listening to it when it comes out, or maybe you're listening to it later on, or maybe you're listening to it maybe even later in the year. But honestly, maybe at some point, maybe it's a point where you've reconnected or recommitted with yourself in the new year, whatever. I just want you to lean into this episode today with me, okay?

01:15Because this episode is, for the woman that's starting, super strong. You know, the new year resolutions, you've got momentum, you've got motivation, you're excited to get some habits, you know, set in place, and you're following through with all of the things. You're wondering though, you're already starting to wonder if this is working, right? You're showing up, like I said, you're following through, you clean things up, you're doing things differently. You said, this is my year. But now maybe, you know, we're into the second week of the new year, whenever you're listening to this again. And maybe you're starting to lose that excitement, or you're tired, and you're sore.

01:54And maybe, you know, you're still working on that relationship with the scale, and you're trying to, you know, it's, you got emotional ties with it, you're trying to break those emotional ties, but you know it doesn't happen overnight. And maybe the scale hasn't moved the way you expected. And maybe there's other things going on. Maybe your body feels heavier, maybe you're more puffier, maybe you're uncomfortable. It may be whatever you may be experiencing that isn't what you thought it would be, is allowing then these thoughts to creep in, which is like, maybe this isn't for me. Maybe I need to do something different. Maybe I need to eat less. Maybe I need to get into the gym more and spend more time in there. Maybe I, maybe I should just stop.

02:31Because at some point, realistically, you guys are already see I know I shared this with you guys in an episode, a couple episodes ago that the gym was packed. I'm already seeing the gym start to like trickle out of it. And it's so I'm surprised it's so early in the new year, to see that already happening. But maybe you're just like, I should stop. And I'm sure somebody at some point is going to have these thoughts. Okay, and that's why I want to like grab ahold of you guys sooner rather than later. So if that is you, that's how you're feeling.

03:01Or even if it's not yet, I'm bad, it's going to happen at some point. So just stick with me in this episode. Because this episode will be probably, you know, one of the most important ones that you listen to all year, because it's gonna help you guys to just stay on track. Even when like, I hope that this episode comes back into your ear. You're listening to it now, maybe in two months, and something just clicks. You're like, I know, I listened to that episode two months ago. I just hope I pray. But anyway, this is the thing that I've seen over the

03:31years of years of being in the industry. Most women don't quit, because nothing is happening. They quit because progress doesn't look the way that they expected it to look, you know, because we've been conditioned to believe that, you know, results should happen super fast. And they should be visible. And they're linear. Like people just think that like, a fat loss scale, because you've probably seen it. Let me just remind you guys to social media is a highlight reel. So if there's coaches out there that are posting the testimonials of the people that they're working with and showing these insane, they're doing it because they want to, you know, get you guys on board to and know that's possible for you guys. But I just wish some coaches out there would be a little bit more realistic in terms of someone that took their progress a full year. That's why like, if you guys go to worry, we have success story as a client interviews that we do on our website, you guys will hear the truth behind these women's stories. I didn't happen fast. It wasn't visible immediately. And it wasn't linear.

04:28To my point, a fat loss graph where you see a lot of things on social media is that it goes like down in a nice, beautiful fashion. It's not like that in a realistic way. For some people it is but more often than not for majority of people. The graph looks like down, up, down, up, down, up, down, up. When we change this, how it's going to feel slow, or it's going to feel messy, or it's going to feel uncomfortable. That's far more important to accept because it's actually what's happening. It is meant to be slow. It is meant to be messy. It's meant to be uncomfortable. It's meant to take time.

05:06And the thing is, is that every, like every transformation, I believe that there's an uncomfortable aspect of it. There is. And not that I believe, actually, there is. And this is, again, what doesn't get highlighted or talked about as often. But in the middle of every single transformation, there is like this meaningful part of a phase that happens in the middle of it. It's not the exciting beginning. It's not always, you know, the satisfying result that you get at the end. Right? Because a lot of people, you know, I'm talking about, you're excited at the beginning, you have momentum, you have motivation. And then once you finally do get to the end of it, you're like, yes, I've accomplished this goal. And it's satisfying. The result that I have is amazing.

05:42Nobody talks about the middle. And this is what you may be experiencing, even if it's early on. And this may be what you may experience in two months. And this may be what you experience come mid-March or April or whatever. And then you're back in the gym in May because you're trying to get that summer body together. I hope and pray that you can keep this consistency. And it doesn't have to be perfect. Let me just add a little story here for you guys. I've been trying to be really because I shared on social media that I sat behind a computer majority of the time because of my work. And so I've been trying to get better at intentionally getting my steps in this year.

06:14And on Tuesday of last week, I had 3000 steps right at the end of the day, maybe four. I was like, dang, that sucks. I could have given up then on my step count. I could have been like, this is not going to happen. I'm not being realistic. That's just an excuse. And that's just a story or a narrative that's coming back into play. Because that's how I ended my year. That's how majority of my year looked like last year. My step count was terrible. I'm not perfect. I'm consistent, though. I got right back to it the next day. I didn't allow one day to trip me up. And that sort of means coming to working out and comes to your nutrition and everything like that. And it means what I'm talking about here is that it means that there's this middle phase, where you're not going to have that momentum, you're not going to have that motivation, you're not going to feel those things. And that result is still so far away. So you have to get used to this middle area where it may not look perfect that way you're showing up, but at least you're showing up consistently. And in this phase, your habits are starting to change.

07:12You're drinking more water, you're dialing in on what you're eating on a daily basis, you're consistently showing up to your workouts may not be perfect every time you get there, but you're still showing up. Your habits are changing. But I need you to understand that you're that identity that you're working towards creating and becoming hasn't yet caught up to that yet. And this is a phase where your body is adapting, right? But it hasn't yet, like I said, revealed that outcome of the satisfying result that you're going to, but your body's adapting here. You can't see these things, but they're happening. Another thing is your nervous system is adjusting to you being more consistent instead of you being in a chaotic state where you have to get this done. I put on my Instagram story the other day, it's like, if you are losing momentum or motivation, remind yourself that you don't have to work out. You get to work out. Because moving your body is a blessing. So it's like your nervous system is then adapting to being, I don't need to be perfect. I don't need to be all or nothing. I just need to be consistent.

08:10Some of you guys aren't used to that. And that's what that this middle phase is making in building within you. And then this phase is like, also, where fat loss is happening internally, before it will show externally. And I always say that you guys can't see or feel the things are happening inside because they're non tangible, but you're getting and realigning your metabolism, the systems, the processes in your body to make fat loss happen externally. And externally. So it's going to happen internally before you ever see it externally.

08:41You know, hormones are recalibrating, inflammation is shifting, your metabolism is learning to trust food again. And because this phase doesn't look like progress, again, like it doesn't look like you're making any progress, because you can't sometimes physically see those things happening. It then feels like you're not making the progress. And it feels like you're failing. And that is where and why most women quit. Not because they're weak, and not because they lack discipline, but because they never thought what this phase would feel like and what it's supposed to feel like and what is actually happening. Some people want those things to happen so fast. Like I said, they want these quick instant results. And that's why they don't they start making these this work, but they give up too soon before their body even is able to show them the result that they want. And that they're actually working towards but they stopped too soon to get it quick break. If you're finding this episode helpful so far, it would mean a lot if you could hit pause for just a second, leave a quick rating or review or share it with someone who's going to get it.

09:40Who could benefit from it? Your support helps more women discover these tools to build muscle, lose fat and feel confident. Thank you so much for being a part of this journey with me. Am I able to just like gently but like clearly challenge something here with you guys? And I'm just hoping you guys are saying yes, because I know that I'm talking to you through a microphone. And you're listening to me through your speakers or your headphones. I'm hoping you're saying yes. But anyway, when women say this isn't working, what you are actually and usually meaning is this doesn't feel good yet, because you want that instant feel good that instant result, or this isn't giving me instant reassurance. And what it usually means, and what people need to develop more of is that this is requiring patience. And guess what patience is uncomfortable, especially if you spent years starting and stopping over and over and over again. But your body doesn't change on your emotional timeline, my friends.

10:39It changes on a biological one. And what that biological timeline needs and requires is you to be consistent, is you to create a you know, that safe environment within your body, and your mind, and time, which so many of you hate. And let's be real, and let's be real and honest with yourself there. Patience is hard. Just accept it, call it for what it is, name it. Okay. Now, what I want to also just dive into with you guys is the scale for a second, because this is where a lot of women emotionally unravel, you start doing things right, you eat more consistently, you're eating enough to feel your body and the processes internally to start shifting things.

11:24You're lifting weights, you're lifting weights, you're drinking your water, you're resting when you're supposed to, you're getting enough sleep at night. And sometimes when you step on the scale, that scale stalls, doesn't do anything, or goes up, or it fluctuates, goes up and down, and your brain, ladies, panics. And again, it emotionally unravels you, you step on the scale in the morning. And like, if it goes down, you're emotionally charged by that, you go on being like, I'm gonna get my workout, I'm gonna get my

11:54my seven drink today, I'm gonna eat my eat my macros, things are working. You step on the scale the next day, and it goes up. And you're like, screw this, this isn't working. And you just give like, you just start to unravel your brain panics, right? But let me just remind you guys, the scale doesn't measure the glycogen replenishment that you're giving to your body with carbs. It doesn't measure muscle inflammation from you hitting a hard and big muscle group, maybe at the work in your workout, the day before, it doesn't measure your hormonal shifts, if you are still someone that gets your period on a monthly basis, it doesn't measure, or even the cortisol, and you're stressed out, doesn't measure that. At that point, when you start panicking, you start questioning the entire process, you start switching gears, you start switching gears to a new plan, you start switching gears, I need to cut more, you start switching gears to following a new plan, or new rules, and I need to cut carbs, and I need

12:53to fast, and I need to, you know, you just, you, your, your mind is wide, and that's okay, that's just how we're, we're wired. But every time you do that, you're training, you're, you're, you're giving your, your brain more reassurance that like, to believe that I don't finish what I start. I mean, how many of you guys have start stopped? And that's not a fitness issue. That's not a program issue. That's not a workout, or that's not, it's, that's an identity, that's a, that's a you issue. I'm just gonna say that with love, because I just want to call it for what it is. I want you guys to start, start,

13:23stopping the start, start, start, stop cycle. Say that 10 times fast. Because that part, this part matters. Every time you quit, even quietly, you're reinforcing a belief that I can't trust myself. I don't follow through on things. Why do you think sometimes unconsciously, you may not even notice this is happening, but there's a conversation going on in your brain. When you're about to start a new program, you have to go tell your husband, you're going to start a new program, you don't even want to bring up that conversation. Because you know what your, the husband's going to say, they're going to, they're going to call you out and hold you accountable. Because they're, they're going to be like, you, another one. And it's true, because you're reinforcing that every time you give up, because you're allowing the scale to dictate it, or something else to dictate, of whether you're making progress or not. And over time, that that belief becomes heavier than the physical weight that you're trying to lose. Because the thing is, and I've said this so many times, it's like the confidence that you are trying to build for yourself, that doesn't come from you being perfect. Like I said earlier, it doesn't come from you showing up onto a program being perfect every single day, you're going to burn out.

14:21What it does come from is confidence comes from you following through, even if the follow through looks like you're 30% on the day. That was me on Tuesday last week, I was 30% on my day, maybe 40%. Because you know, 40 at 4000 steps out of 10,000 is 40%. I still showed up though, I still did something as best as I could that day. Confidence comes from staying when it's boring. I heard so many times over the last years of being in the industry is like, women get their program for four weeks, and by the fourth week, they're bored. So what? If you stay through that, if you stay through that, you don't go into the gym and say, I'm going to do a different workout program this week. It's boring for a reason. When things are unclear, when progress isn't happening, and you still stay and follow through. That's confidence being built. You stay when it's unclear. It doesn't make sense. You stay when you don't feel rewarded yet.

15:10I think everyone would be accomplishing their goals if at the end of every single day, they received some type of reward. Right? But fitness and working out and changing your body composition is you don't get a reward every day. In terms of what a lot of people want to see, you get a reward from completing consistently following through. Yes, that's what where confidence comes from. It's, it comes from you staying when you don't feel rewarded yet. But you get some type of reward crushing your workouts, if you want to look at it that way. But a lot of people look at it like, am I making progress? This is also to, right before results start to show up, where a lot of people start to give up, you could be doing all these things. And like I said, the progress is not necessarily like always externally showing up.

15:52Right before you're about to give up right before those results are not before you're about to show and where you're about to just like, it's like, what's that? I've seen that Instagram picture at the guy chiseling away. It's like a meme. He's chiseling away at a mound of rocks. And he keeps chiseling away and chiseling away and chiseling away. He's working with it. He doesn't see it yet. There's a diamond right in the middle. You don't see it yet. That diamond is your body changing and creating a transformation.

16:22Starting to show progress, right? Starting to show the results. Most women get chiseled, chiseled, putting the work. They're doing the work. It may not look perfect, right? And they're doing it and doing it and doing it. And by the time they get to literally like they're about to just the next throw at the rock wall is going to break through into the diamond. Most women stop right there. And what's happening right before that happens is your metabolism is starting to stabilize, your hunger cues are recalibrating, your strength is increasing, your stress response is lowering. But because those those these changes are more internal first, like I said, your brain doesn't celebrate them. So what it does is it tries to pull you back into what's familiar, pulls you back into restriction and pulls you back into control, pulls you back into chaos, pulls you back into starting over again.

17:08That's not progress. That is you self sabotaging. And it's disguises disguises for many women is you think it's strategic and strategy. And I need to cut and I need to work harder and I need to be all or nothing. I mean, what do you do? Has that ever worked? Let me just ask you that. Has that ever worked? Are you where you want to be? Majority of you are probably gonna say no. So if you are in that phase right now, if you were and this could again, I'm hoping that I'm capturing all of your souls before you hit I mean, you are going to hit it at some point, it's inevitable, but maybe this will be on replay in your mind. Maybe you just come back to it episode 327. And you listen to this again. If you're in that phase right now, here's where I want you to focus on number one, stop asking, is this working? Stop asking?

17:56Is this working? And better yet, start asking yourself, am I being consistent? Am I being consistent? Not am I being perfect? Not am I all or nothing? Am I being consistent? Do some days look like 30% cool? Do I show up the next day and a 70% cool? That's consistent. And then measure your your wins differently. Don't focus on the number on the scale. Ladies, please focus on strength increases. Focus on how your energy is feeling. Focus on you experiencing better recovery. Focus on you having less obsession over things over food over working out over getting your steps in. Number three, focus on dude, it's going to be uncomfortable and expect the discomfort. Please allow yourself to be uncomfortable in this journey. But don't interpret it as danger.

18:46Growth is always going to be uncomfortable. Growth is always going to feel uncertain, unfamiliar, unclear before it feels empowering. And then just remember and lean into the person that you're becoming. I always say this, like, who you are now is and what you want to accomplish looks different at the end and who you're becoming. Women who get results aren't the ones who start the most. They're the ones who actually finish it. So what is that person that you're working to evolve into? What is she doing differently than what you're doing now? Because that person's already accomplished the goal. She's logging her meals in MyFitnessPal. She's waking up and she's making sure they're in there logged for the day. She's she's already getting she's getting her workouts done consistently on a weekly basis. Right? Just think about that. Because this is much bigger than macros is much bigger than weight loss. This is bigger than like you having January motivation and a New Year's goal.

19:41It's about becoming who you say you're going to become and keeping the promises that you're making to yourself. The one who doesn't run when the moment gets hard or feels uncomfortable feels uncertain. The one that doesn't just continue to seek reassurance every single day and then runs away of reassurance disappears. Right? Like it's like think about the middle phase of a journey. And just be that woman that stays through that phase as best as you can. 1% better every single day because she's going to get results. But more importantly, she's going to become someone that she trusts in herself again believes in herself and has a confidence because she fell followed through this time.

20:15All right? From this episode, if you're listening to this and you're in that middle phase or maybe the middle phase is going to happen in weeks or months to come because it will, just know you're not doing anything wrong. You're exactly where most women quit. And if you stay, you won't just see and experience a transformation that you want to have. You are going to start embodying it because of the work that you just went through. So I don't know if you need to hear it, but I'm proud of you for being in the middle phase because that's where you can learn a lot about you, yourself, your habits, and all the things of what I just talked about in this episode today.

20:49All right, my friends. I love you guys. And I'll see you in the next episode. Real quick, if this episode resonated with you or gave you the push that you needed, I'd love for you to pay it forward. Drop a quick rating and review, share the podcast with someone who might need it, and help me keep spreading the word. Your feedback not only helps to show grow, but it might just be the nudge someone else needs to kickstart their transformation. Thank you so, so, so much for your support.

This transcript was generated automatically and may contain errors.