Why Your Fitness Results Don't Match Your Effort

Nikkiey: You need to start making decisions based on who you are becoming and what that person would do in the moment. The person you are becoming, and the results that person is going to have, is going to operate differently in the face of the excuse "I don't have enough time." They're going to make the time because it's a priority to them, because they're committed to it.

What's up, you guys? Hey, everyone. Welcome back to The WarriorBabe Show with Nikkiey Stott, co-founder of WarriorBabe. On this podcast, we talk about mindset, methodologies, and tactics that will help you lose body fat, build muscle, be strong, and feel insanely confident. I am your host, Nikkiey Stott, and welcome, my friends, to episode number 259.

Today, guys, we're having a no-fluff conversation about the real reason your results might not be where you want them to be. It's not going to be a nutrition conversation. It's not going to be a training conversation, or "Am I working out hard enough?" or "Am I eating enough?" It's going to be around the mindset aspect. That's the takeaway I want you to have from this episode. It's not because you don't want the goal you're going after badly enough. It's not because you're missing the perfect, quote-unquote, plan.

And guys, I'm going to have some tough love with you all today, because that's just the vibe I'm on right now. As a side note, I believe I'm in the follicular phase of my cycle, so I'm in the no-fucks attitude right now. And I'm going to pour into you guys because I love you so much, and I see this topic unconsciously holding people back from getting to their goals and where they want to be.

So it's going to be mindset related, like I said. Again, it's not because you don't want to achieve your goals badly enough. It's not because you're missing out on the perfect thing for you. And while there may be a little bit of a percentage to those things, it's mainly because your standards don't match your goals.

So if you're feeling stuck in your journey, if you're feeling stuck in your fat loss, or even in your mindset, if you have these narratives going on of lack, of not being enough, of "I can't do this," or of old patterns and old habits, I want you to ask yourself this one question: What standard am I operating from right now?

Because here's the deal. The standards you set are the results you're going to get. You can't expect drastic results, drastic changes, or elite outcomes while holding yourself to average effort, to the effort you've been putting in year after year, week after week, day after day.

So I want to break down how you can raise your standards and finally get results that actually stick. And I want you to just think about that question: What standard am I operating from right now? As I dive into this topic with you, I want that question hanging there on the sideline, so that when I bring up a higher-level standard, you can see where you may be operating from right now.

I want you to mentally grasp it by the end of this episode. But then I want you to go into your daily efforts today, tomorrow, next week, next month, consistently trying to raise yourself to those standards. Because this is the thing: you don't rise to your goals. You have these goals in mind, but you don't rise to them. You fall to your standards on a daily basis. And your daily standards are what's unconsciously holding you back from rising up to the goals you have.

It's a high-level thought process, but just keep tracking with me. One of the myths I see in fitness, and I've talked about this in early episodes, there's a really good one about focusing on your systems, not your goals, because once you get the systems in place, you will get to your goals. A myth I see is that setting a big goal is enough. It's not enough.

You can say every single day, "I want to lose 20 pounds." How many times have you said that over and over again? Or "I want to feel amazing in my skin." Or "I want to wear a two-piece bikini." Or "I want to build muscle and tone up." Or "I want to get rid of these love handles, this bat wing." Those are just wishes if your standards don't back them up. Because when push comes to shove, you're not going to rise to that goal. You're going to fall to the level of your systems, your habits, and your standards.

Here's what I mean by that. If your standard is only training when you feel motivated, how many of you only get after it because you feel motivated and you're led by that emotion? You haven't yet realized that motivation is an emotion and it's going to ebb and flow. If your standard is that you only train when you feel motivated, you're going to fall to that standard every single day.

Or maybe your standard is trying to eat healthy without structure. I've heard that all the time. I've talked to thousands of women who say, "I eat healthy." And I ask, "What does eating healthy look like to you?" And it's, "Well, I wake up and have avocado toast." And I'm like, cool, that's healthy. Where's the protein? Or "I eat three meals a day": maybe a chicken salad at lunch, avocado toast at breakfast, and then, I hear this all day, whatever I make for the family at night. And I'm like, okay, but are you getting the results you want with that?

So my point is, you're falling to the standard of trying to eat healthy without any type of structure in your day. Or skipping breakfast and then overeating later. That's your standard. That was me back in the day. I would always skip breakfast and then eat from lunch to dinner. Or I would go all day long without eating and then hoard all my food at nighttime and eat one meal. That was me 10 years ago, and that was my standard. Was I getting the results I wanted? No. And this is why: every day I was falling to the level of my standards, my habits, and my systems.

Or if your standard is getting only four hours of sleep, and you're wondering why you're exhausted and craving junk food. Guess what? If these are your standards, you're going to get inconsistent, frustrating results that don't reflect your true effort.

And this isn't about me yelling at you or shaming you. I told you I was going to give you tough love. It's about waking you up. It's about shaking you. If I were in person with you having this conversation, like I shared in a previous episode about my trip to Mexico, meeting these women where they're at, I'd want to shake you. I want to wake you up. That's what I'm doing in these episodes. I love you guys so much. I want you to win. I want you to see my perspective through my lens: if you're operating this way, this is what's going to happen. Because when you realize your current standards are actually below the level of results you say you want, that's when everything starts to change.

Let me say that one more time, because I want it to click. When you realize how you're currently operating, what your systems, habits, and standards are, if you're only training when you're motivated, only trying to eat healthy without structure, skipping breakfast and overeating later, getting only four hours of sleep and wondering why you're exhausted and craving junk food, if you're operating from those standards and you realize they're below the level of the results you say you want, that's when it changes.

Because, and I'm going to get into this, the results you want will take the standard of: "I'm going to have to become disciplined, because motivation ebbs and flows. I need to eat with structure, because nutrition is really freaking important. I need to make sure I'm getting a consistent amount of the right types of protein, fats, and carbs, or more meals in the day, because I need to eat more food. I can't skip breakfast, because if I skip breakfast, chaos happens internally." You should know this by now from all the episodes I've shared. And if you're only getting four hours of sleep, you understand how important sleep is.

So if you're operating from the opposite of what I just said, only training when you feel motivated, only trying to eat healthy, you're operating below the level of the results you say you want. And when you can recognize and realize that, that's where literally everything starts to change. If you can be honest with yourself, take responsibility, own where you're at in your life right now, and bring awareness to it, you can start to change everything.

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I wanted this episode to flow from the fit identity episode I did, because that one soared through the roof in numbers. If you haven't checked it out, go check it out. People must have had it on repeat or shared it, and I love you guys for doing that. I say it every episode, but I appreciate you sharing the episodes, and that one blew up.

What I want to pull from the fit identity episode into this one is that identity is a standard, because your identity is like the thermostat that sets your behavior. If you want to become that fit identity, you've got to start with your standards. If you see yourself as someone who's always on and off, like I talked about in that episode, someone who's always struggling with consistency, someone who just isn't, quote-unquote, disciplined, then every time life gets hard, you default to that identity.

But when you raise your standards, you start shifting your self-concept. You start saying things like, "I'm someone who doesn't break promises to myself." That is one of my mottos: I keep the promises I make to myself. "I'm the type of woman who shows up even when I don't feel like it. This is just who I am now." Start saying things like that. And again, it's not about being perfect. I've talked in episodes about times I dreaded things and just muscled through it. It's not about being that. It's about being aligned.

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All right, let's get back to the show. You're no longer trying to force yourself into consistency. You're operating from a new identity, and your actions will naturally start to match it. Because if you want to become that fit girl, if you want to be healthy, confident, and strong, if you want that body and those results, you've got to change how you're operating right now. How you're operating right now is what got you to where you are right now. You need to start operating from a new identity and taking different actions daily. And when you start taking different actions daily, you're naturally going to match that new identity.

That's where confidence gets built, my friends. Not from the overarching big goal itself, but from becoming the woman who lives at higher standards on a daily basis: meal prepping your food, tracking your macros, creating structure, showing up at the gym even when you don't want to, when you're not motivated, getting enough sleep through the night. Obviously, all of this isn't going to happen overnight. But if you can start taking different actions that align with that identity on a daily basis, you're going to notice a compound effect. In six or eight months, you'll notice you're showing up way differently than you did six or eight months ago.

So what actually changes when you raise your standards? Everything. You start expecting more from yourself. Not in a hustle culture or toxic type of way, but in a way that's very self-respecting. You start showing up even on hard days, because your standard is no longer tied to the emotion of whether you're feeling good or feeling it, or "I'm just too busy" or "I don't have enough time." You start showing up on those days because you're no longer tied to that excuse or to the emotion of "I'm tired," "I'm too busy," "I'm exhausted," "I'm frustrated," or "I'm angry." You're tied to commitment.

And that's the big shift: you stop making decisions based on how you feel in the moment and start making decisions based on who you are becoming. If you make decisions in the moment, based on emotion, you're going to continue to operate from who you are right now, and that's not the name of the game anymore. You need to start making decisions based on who you are becoming and what that person would do in the moment. The person you are becoming, and the results that person is going to have, is going to operate differently in the face of the excuse "I don't have enough time." They're going to make the time because it's a priority to them, because they're committed to it.

And once you start doing that, guys, your excuses get way quieter. Your follow-through gets so much stronger. You become the woman who can trust herself. That's huge. And your results stop being inconsistent. They stop being yo-yo-y. They become literally inevitable, because your standard holds the line. Mic drop. I'm going to mic drop on my own podcast.

Okay. You've got to hold the line for yourself. And what does that line look like? Are you going to lower to your current standards, or are you going to raise the bar for yourself? Because who you want to become is operating from a different standard. You've got to hold the line.

Now, you guys know what I do. I like to talk about practical takeaways. Let's talk about action, because I know some of you are like, "All right, I'm ready. Nikkiey, you're pouring into me. I hear you loud and clear. I feel like you're speaking right to me. But where do I even start?" Because I threw out a bunch of things you can start doing, and I know that can be overwhelming. So here are three powerful ways you can raise your standards starting today.

One, I want you to audit your current acceptable minimum. What are you doing right now that you're tolerating that doesn't match that future version of you? Maybe you're hitting 50 grams of protein and calling it good enough. 50, 60, 70, 80 grams of protein, and you're calling it good enough. Maybe it's skipping workouts because you're tired, even though you know movement is what will help your energy and help you get stronger. Get real about the low standards you've normalized for yourself.

I'm going to pull back to the Mexico trip. The women I talked to said, "I don't have enough time." Okay? You don't have enough time for your health. You don't have enough time to seek out better ways to eat for yourself, which is going to ripple into how you raise your kids to eat better, and your husband or partner may even jump on board. You don't have enough time for that. You don't have enough time to prioritize your overall well-being. What? When I say that out loud, how does that relate back to you? When I say it out loud, "You don't have enough time for that."

So get real about that low standard you've normalized for yourself. Because if you continue to say "I don't have enough time," you're going to continue to operate from that lower standard. You're going to have that excuse in everything you do, when what you want to do, say eating better or working out, is going to drastically improve your life. Maybe it's even in a professional space: "I just don't have enough time to sit down, go on LinkedIn, and look for jobs," even though you may be in a position where you need a job, and you're operating from "I don't have enough time" because other things are getting in the way. Whatever. I'm going to go back to fitness, because you all know this is the fitness podcast. But that's the first thing I want you to do: audit your current acceptable minimum.

The second thing I want you to do is choose one elevated standard and lock it in. I don't want you to try to change 10 things. I just want you to pick one thing. Maybe it's "I hit my protein every day, no matter what." Maybe it's "I train three times a week minimum." Maybe it's "I don't hit the snooze button in the morning, and I get up when I say I will." And hold that standard, especially when it's inconvenient, especially if you're tired and busy and you don't have enough time and you've got to spend an hour meal prepping. Pick one that's elevated. It's different from where you are. It's the opposite of the low standard you've normalized. That's how your identity will start to shift.

The third thing I want you to do is change your language. Your words, what you say to yourself, are like the Bible. Words matter. Stop saying "I'm trying." Start saying "This is just who I am now." Do you hear and feel that difference? Stop saying "I just don't have enough time." Start saying "This is what I prioritize for my health." Stop saying "I'm just too busy." Start saying "These are tools and resources I want to learn so I can be a better role model for my family, my friends, and the people closest to me in my space." So I can understand my health, help them understand their health, and make my overall well-being better and their overall well-being better. Ain't nobody too busy for that.

When you change your language, language anchors into your behavior. If you speak like someone who's unsure, "I'm trying," "I don't have enough time," "I'm too busy," you'll act like someone who's unsure. Your actions will turn into not making enough time, not following through, not showing up.

Speak with ownership. Own your new standard before it even feels natural for you. It's not going to feel natural at the beginning, because you're literally rewiring how you've operated for so long. It's going to feel messy. It's going to feel unnatural. You're going to have some bumps in the road. Maybe when you say "This is just who I am" out loud, it's going to feel weird. But just keep saying it. Own it. Speak it with ownership.

You've got to raise the bar to raise your life. If you've been wondering why things aren't clicking, why your results feel slow or inconsistent, why you're frustrated, or why you start getting results and feeling strong but can't seem to stay there, check in on you. Check in on your standards. Check on where you're at. Take responsibility, because your results don't lie. They will always reflect the level you're currently living at.

God is just speaking through me right now, into you guys and pouring into you guys. I want more for you. I want more for you, not just physically, but mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Because when you raise your standards in one area of life, they rise everywhere.

Okay, so here's your challenge, my friends. Audit your standards right where you're at. Choose one to raise, and hold the line. Hold the line. That's going to be my line. Hold the line, not just when it's easy, and especially when it's not easy. Because the standards you set are the results you are going to get.

If this episode hit home for you, please share it with someone who needs to hear this message too. Spread the word. Get people to notice. It is my hope and dream that if more people understand this message, more people will change where they're currently at so they can do better and be better for themselves.

Till next time, you guys. Stay elevated. Work on these things. Stay strong. And just stop settling for less when you're capable of so much more. All right? Love you guys. Peace out. See you in the next episode.

Real quick: if this episode resonated with you or gave you the push you needed, I'd love for you to pay it forward. Drop a quick rating and review, share the podcast with someone who might need it, and help me keep spreading the word. Your feedback not only helps the show grow, but it might just be the nudge someone else needs to kickstart their transformation. Thank you so, so, so much for your support.