How Exercise Supports Your Mental Health After 40

Nikkiey: You miss a workout and your whole day feels off. Not because you're tired, not because your body needed rest, but because you feel guilty. You feel worthless. You feel like you failed. That guilt that you are feeling is not discipline. That's your mental health being tied to a behavior in a way that isn't serving you.

Anxiety lives in our body. I think in one way, shape or form, we all have it. And it doesn't just live in the mind. You have a racing heart, you have shallow breathing, you have muscle tension. When you exercise, you're giving your body an outlet for that psychological stress response. You're burning off that adrenaline, which is why a hard workout can feel like a full emotional exhale when you leave the gym. This is why.

What's going on, everyone? Hey, you guys. Welcome back to another episode of The WarriorBabe Show, where we talk about mindset, methodologies and tactics that will help you lose body fat, build muscle, be strong and feel insanely confident. I'm your host, Nikkiey Stott, and this is episode number 345.

Today's episode is one that I've honestly been sitting with for a while, mainly because it's personal and because I think it's something that a lot of us just need to hear right now. In this episode, we're going to talk about why you work out. Not the fitness industry answer, not the answer that you give when someone asks you in the gym, but your real answer. The one that's underneath the "I'm working out because I have this set goal," or "I'm working out because I want to feel strong," or "I'm working out to better my health." There's an answer that's beneath that.

The conversation I want to have with you guys today is about what I'm seeing data start to confirm, which is what a lot of us already feel: the number one reason people work out in 2026 is their mental health. It's not because of aesthetics. It's not because of performance. Yes, there's "I want to get to a goal," and I'm going to talk about that within this episode. But it's mainly "I get to the gym because it makes my brain feel good. It makes me feel good." It's that mental and emotional well-being. That ranked higher than physical fitness goals, higher than weight loss, higher than all of it.

It was more so, "I get into the gym because if I don't, then I'm a punching bag for the rest of the day," or the people around me are a punching bag because of my emotional offload onto them. Because if I don't get into the gym, my mental well-being is subpar. I've heard that from so many people.

Now, I'm not saying that people don't go to the gym because they also have a weight loss goal. But what studies are starting to show is that this is why people really do it. It's higher than just the physical aspects of getting into the gym. And I think that changes everything about how we should be talking about fitness moving forward.

In WarriorBabe, we talk about the mindset. Mindset is a huge pillar. It's not just macros. It's not just "here's a workout plan." It's the mindset aspect that's going to take somebody from where they are now, at the beginning of their journey, to changing their mindset to get them to the transformation that they want at the end. And that's how I feel the conversations should be. So in today's episode, we're going to go there. We're going to talk about it, unfold it, unpack it, and I'm even going to bring some science-y stuff into this episode as well. So let's just get into it.

For a really long time, the fitness industry sold us on one thing, right? It sold us on having a smaller, leaner, tighter, more toned body. It's still doing that to this day. It sold us on the before and the after. If you worked out, you were going to do it because it was going to make you look different. That was the goal.

And look, I'm not here to tell you that wanting to look good is wrong. It's not. We're all here to accomplish some type of goal, because that mentally ties into how we're feeling. There's nothing wrong with having aesthetic goals. But I think a lot of us were using aesthetics as the only language we had to justify taking care of ourselves. Because saying "I go to the gym because it's the only hour of my day where I feel like myself" felt too vulnerable. So nobody really says that to somebody else unless they're a close friend, right?

Think about the conversations I'm trying to unpack here. You'll say that to somebody close in your family or in your circle. But if you're talking to somebody at the gym, it's, "Oh, I have X goal to get to," right? Because results-oriented is how our brains were wired.

But something is starting to shift. I think it started back in the pandemic. That broke something, in the best way. When gyms closed and the world fell apart, people kept moving. And they didn't keep moving for abs. They kept moving for their sanity, for their structure, for a routine, for something to hold on to when everything else felt like chaos.

If you think back to that time, which was about six years ago, some people were still couch potatoes. But the majority of the world was like, "I'm going to get outside. I'm going to go for a walk. I'm going to focus on my health, because this pandemic is taking out people that weren't focusing on their health. So I'm going to start focusing on my health and my mental well-being and being outside, rather than being cooped up inside all day long." You tracking with me here?

And we kind of haven't gone back. Because once you feel what movement does for your mind, it's really hard to unfeel that. So now we're in this moment where the research is catching up to what the gym girls have been doing and have known in their bones for years, right? "I don't work out for aesthetics. I work out because it makes me feel good. I work out because I'm training for life." Exercise is mental health care, and it deserves to be talked about, loudly.

I think a lot of people are now finally realizing that. Don't get me wrong, there are still a lot of conversations like "I want to look toned, I want to be this way, I want to be lean and fit for the summertime." Results-oriented. But it's almost not enough. This pillar of mental health and mental well-being tied to working out is becoming the next wave, in my opinion. Okay?

So I want to go to the science here for a second. Not in a boring way, I promise, but because I think understanding why movement affects your mood is actually really empowering. It's not just a vibe. There's real stuff happening internally. In your mind, things are shifting. You've probably heard these terms before as well, but I really want to get down to the why behind it, because you guys know how I feel: if you understand the why, you're more likely to get behind it and actually start implementing it. Or you start to change your mindset to, "Hey, I'm going to the gym for my well-being. Yes, sure, for aesthetics and to feel better and to lose weight and XYZ. But I'm doing it because it makes me feel really good, and then the rest of my day is positively impacted because of that."

So, endorphins. You've probably heard about endorphins, right? But it's more complicated than just that. We've all heard exercise releases endorphins, and yes, that's true. But endorphins are actually just one piece of a much bigger picture. More researchers are studying it, and the more they do, the more they realize that the mental health benefits of movement go way deeper than a post-workout rush. It goes way deeper than motivation.

And that brings me to my next point, which is dopamine, which I'm sure you guys have heard of. Dopamine and motivation. Exercise increases your dopamine, your brain's reward and motivation chemical. This is why consistent training can actually make you more motivated in other areas of your life outside of the gym. It's not just that you feel good after a workout. You actually start to feel more capable in general.

Think about it. If you've been on this journey for a while, how many times have you bettered your life in your work? Bettered your relationship with your partner? Bettered the structure you have for your family? This is what's happening behind the scenes of you consistently going to work out and getting your training done. Those two things working together, endorphins and dopamine, wire our brains differently. It's because of the chemicals that are being released when we work out.

Cortisol is also a big thing. Working out helps to regulate our cortisol, and this one's huge, especially for women. We know chronic stress keeps our cortisol levels elevated, which then tanks your sleep. It messes with your hormones. It increases your inflammation. It makes everything harder to do. When you implement consistent and moderate exercise into your routine, it becomes one of the most effective tools we have for regulating our cortisol. Right?

It's not about crushing yourself every day, but about being consistent. And you guys know I've talked about this: consistency looks different for everybody. On Monday, somebody might work out. Tuesday, they might work out. Wednesday is an off day. Thursday might be an off day. But they get into the gym Friday and Saturday. It's still consistent, because that's what they've put down. If it's anything less than three to four days a week, then you need to hone in on your consistency. But it looks different for everyone, even Monday through Sunday. Someone could be showing up at 80%. The next day could be 60%, then the next day 100, then 40, then 20, then 90. But you're still consistent, and that's going to help regulate your cortisol.

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Another avenue of what's actually happening with this is anxiety and the body. I don't think a lot of people talk about this. Sometimes I have to check myself and bring myself back down to the level of people who are just getting into their fitness journey, because I've been in it for over a decade now. When I talk to people in my circle, they've been in it for that long too. We talk about the kinds of things I'm sharing with you here, because we've been witnesses of it. We've seen the transformations that women have made, and they're reporting this kind of stuff. But I don't think it gets talked about enough with people who are just starting out on their journey.

Anxiety lives in our body. I think in one way, shape or form, we all have it. And it doesn't just live in the mind. You have a racing heart. You have shallow breathing. You have muscle tension. When you exercise, you're giving your body an outlet for that psychological stress response. You're burning off that adrenaline. You're completing the stress cycle. Which is why a hard workout can feel like a full emotional exhale when you leave the gym. This is why.

I've heard so many testimonials from people who say they've come off anxiety medication or don't have anxiety anymore because they just focus on consistent training. This is a perfect example. If you're somebody who has anxiety, it doesn't just live in your mind. It lives in your body as well. And this is why working out can feel like such an emotional release. This is why movement is medicine. Literally. It's documented. Right? You've been taking it this whole time, maybe without even knowing why it's working. Maybe this is closing some loops on why you feel so good after working out. This is what's happening in your body. Okay?

But real talk, I want to lean in a little bit. The fact that exercise is good for mental health does not mean that all exercise, in all forms, at all times, is mentally healthy for you. I think making that distinction matters a lot. Because there's a version of using fitness for your mental health that is genuinely healing. And then there's another version that is using the gym to cope, to control, to punish, to avoid things. And those two things can look almost identical from the outside.

So I want to talk through some of what I've personally gone through and lived, and also some patterns I've seen. I want to talk through this because I think normalizing this conversation is how we can actually help each other. And what I ask is that if this helps you realize some things, you leave this conversation today and in turn go help somebody else. Maybe it's by sharing this podcast, because maybe what I'm sharing in here is hard to articulate to somebody else, or it will articulate it for somebody else and make a shift in that person's life. Because we've all been there. I've been there.

I want to talk about the guilt spiral first. You miss a workout and your whole day feels off. Not because you're tired. Not because your body needed rest. Because you feel guilty. You feel worthless. You feel like you failed. That guilt that you are feeling is not discipline. That's your mental health being tied to a behavior in a way that isn't serving you.

You are going to the gym, and there's a version of you that looks identical from the outside. There's somebody who's using fitness for their mental health and is genuinely healing themselves. But there's another person doing this who is avoiding, controlling, coping and punishing themselves by feeling guilty for missing a workout. That's not serving you.

Then there's using intensity to numb yourself. Some of us go so hard. I've been there, done that. That is how I started my fitness journey. I had broken off an engagement, and almost a month later I started my fitness journey. I was a New Year's resolutioner. So some of us go hard not because we want to get stronger, but because if we stop moving, we have to feel something that we don't want to feel. That was me. So if you're there right now, I feel you and I resonate with you.

The gym becomes a way to outrun this anxiety, outrun this grief, or outrun the emotions that, at the end of the day, need to be processed through. Not ignored, not pushed under the rug, not sprinted past. The workout isn't the problem. It's what you're not letting yourself do when you're not in the gym.

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I'm saying all this with love, because I've been there. Something else that has also happened to me is being in an identity trap. "I'm someone who works out every day, no matter what." Because it becomes who you are. This was me in my bodybuilding days. Rest feels like an identity crisis, even though your body is screaming at you that it's exhausted. You're not just taking a day off. You feel like you're not being yourself.

And that rigidity is worth looking at. It's worth being honest with yourself and saying, "Hey, am I somebody who does this?" And then, on the day you decide to take off because you're exhausted, sitting with yourself and processing, being able to sit with the emotions of what that actually feels like. That goes back to what I said before about numbing, right? You're going to the gym to numb something, and those emotions need to be processed.

The last one, I'm going to lean on lightly, but it still needs to be said: exercise and disordered eating. Using exercise to compensate for eating, or feeling like you have to earn food through your workouts. Or you watched your calorie burn and now you're like, "Okay, I can go eat this kind of food. I can go eat this amount of food afterwards." That's a disordered pattern. It doesn't always look like what we imagine when we picture an eating disorder. It can look like a really disciplined fitness person. But it's hurting you, and you deserve some type of support with that.

I say none of this to shame you, you guys. I'm saying it because I think a lot of us are somewhere on the spectrum and we don't have language for it. It's not being leaned into or talked about, either because some people are afraid to lean in and communicate it, since they're unsure how people will receive it, or because they just don't have the ability to articulate it. And part of working out for your mental health is being honest about when the way you're training isn't actually healthy.

What we just talked about is heavy, right? Especially if there's somebody you know, a friend or a co-worker, who may be doing this. It's heavy to sit in that. So to come out of it, a question to ask yourself is: when you miss a workout, how do you feel? Do you feel relieved? Do you feel rested? Or do you feel anxious, guilty and like you failed? Your honest answer is going to tell you a lot about your relationship with exercise.

And that's where you can lean a little more into how to start fixing that coping mechanism, so it's more for your mental health. Looking at it as an outlet, looking at it as a relief, looking at it as "I'm bettering myself and I'm healing through my fitness," rather than trying to have it be controlled.

So now, putting this into practice. I don't want this to just be us sitting in the heavy and talking about all the things, why this is and what it is. I want something concrete that you can take into your next week. Okay? So how can you start implementing this? How can you put it into practice?

First and foremost, know what you actually need that day. Some days your mental health needs intensity. It needs a hard lift. It needs a sprint. It needs an outlet for stress. Other days it just needs gentleness. It needs a walk. It needs a slow yoga flow, or it needs nothing at all. Tuning into what you need rather than just executing what's on the program is a skill, and it keeps getting stronger and sharper the more you practice it. It's you being in control of it, not allowing exercise to be in control of you.

So tune in: "Hey, does my body actually need a break today?" Okay, lean into that a little bit. And then when you lean into it, watch what that actually feels like. When do you feel all of these anxious and guilty emotions? Okay, process that. Work through it. Write it down. Journal. It's not going to happen overnight. You're still going to feel like that in three weeks, let me just tell you. But it's like a muscle. It's about working and building that muscle over months and putting what I'm saying here into practice.

Another thing: stop using metrics as your only measure of a good workout. Weight lifted, calories burned, steps counted. These are all valid data points, don't get me wrong. But they're a terrible way to measure whether a workout did what your mind actually needed. Instead, if you're somebody who's working on this, ask, "How do I feel right now compared to before I worked out? Did I move through something emotionally today? Did I show up for myself?" Those matter too. Do you feel an emotional exhale coming out of a workout? Great. You're doing it for healing. Again, you're the one who's in control of it.

Another thing I would say is let the goal be consistency over intensity. Showing up moderately and consistently does more for your brain than crushing it three times a week and burning yourself out. A 20-minute walk five days a week is generally more powerful for mental health than one brutal 90-minute session.

I'm not saying you can't train hard. Don't get me wrong here, you guys. It's more about checking in with yourself: "Hey, what do I need today?" You're still working out four days a week. But maybe your training program had a workout set for Tuesday, and you wake up feeling exhausted because the day before you didn't sleep well or there was a lot of stress at work. You're allowed to take that day off and push that workout to Wednesday.

Or check in with yourself before you get into the gym. For me, when I'm in my luteal phase, which is the 10 days or so before my period, the last thing I want to do is a brutally intense workout and go balls to the wall. My body ain't there. That's something I've learned over time. I'm still in the gym and I'm still going to challenge myself, but I challenge myself to what I'm capable of that day. That's what I mean in this episode: getting to the point where you're able to have those conversations with yourself.

I want to leave you guys with something maybe you didn't know you needed, which is permission. Permission to work out because it makes you feel like yourself. Not because you need to change your body. Not because you have a goal to hit. Not because you saw something on your social media feed that made you feel behind. But because it's one of the best things you can do for your mind, and you deserve that.

I'm giving you permission to scale back when your mental load is heavy. To take the walk instead of the PR attempt. To skip a session and not spiral. And to give yourself rest without feeling guilty or like you failed. I'm giving you that permission.

Permission to be honest about your relationship with exercise. To look at the patterns that aren't serving you, and to get support, to journal and to heal from that. That support could be from a therapist, a coach, a friend, or just this podcast, right?

And also permission to rewrite your why at any point in your journey, because you're going to go through multiple seasons. Take me, for example, and my story. The reason I started working out was all of the things I just listed above. Exercise controlled me. At the beginning of my journey, I was running away from having to process emotions and learning how to do that. You're going to have to do it at some point, guys, right? I just say that because I love you.

You're allowed to evolve. You're allowed to change your why along the way. How you started working out doesn't have to be the reason you keep going. It sure as heck isn't the reason I keep going every day. I keep going because my mental health loves it, and I've healed myself through exercise. You are allowed to evolve. You're allowed to decide that how you feel matters more than how you look. You're allowed to train for your life, not just your body. Literally, when someone asks me in the gym what I'm training for, I say I'm training for life. That's actually the strongest thing you can do. Okay?

So that's it for today's episode. And honestly, I would love to know where this landed for you. This one was a little bit heavy, but at the same time there was a lot of enlightenment that came from it. So I'm wondering where it landed. Reach out to me on Instagram and tell me. Start a DM. I want to know, right?

If you've ever felt guilty for resting, if you've ever had a complicated relationship with exercise, if you ever needed someone to tell you how to feel, I'm hoping that this is what it was. All right? If this episode hit home, please share it, you guys. Send it to your gym besties. Send it to your sister. Send it to your friend. Send it to someone who needs permission right now for all of the things I just gave you permission for. That's how we grow. All right? Love you guys. I'll see you in the next episode. Peace out.

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